Monday, January 31, 2011

TMI Tuesday.....

Hi Everybody...
I'm too busy 'hunkering-down' for Tuesday
Nights projected 8-17 inches of snow. So I thought you
might like to see some cartoon ideas that a couple of my
cousins have been working on....Enjoy!!

Sunday, January 30, 2011

Micro-Fiction Monday.....

There it is Melville, the only survivor....
A Double Entendre!!!
Although Melville thought the whole thing was...
A little Redundant!
Every Monday, Susan the Missing Mensan posts a picture
of her choice on her blog. Copy the pic on your blog and
provide a caption in 140 characters or less. Then go tell her...

Thursday, January 27, 2011

Friday Flash 55.....

He usually kept his rage under control.
But everyone has their breaking point!
Day in...Day out, it's the same old shit.
A piece of chicken here, some pizza there.
Is your lunch public domain?
Can people NOT read your name?
But it's OK....
Retribution has manifested itself in the form of...
Ex-Lax Brownies!!!



Extra Rich AND Fudgy!!!!
If you or anyone you know has written a Friday Flash 55
Please come tell The G-Man....
I will visit, read, enjoy, comment...Then BOOK!!!
So from the most evil host from coast to coast...
Have a Kick Ass Week-End!!!

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Thursday Portrait.....


Hi Everybody....
Something very distressing happened to me yesterday.
My FaceBook account was HACKED by some weight-loss
pill advertiser. My picture popped up and a link was sent!
For those of you that are my'Friends', I'm sorry for any
inconvenience. And let me add that I would NEVER send a
link to anyone. I changed my password!!
All this angst made me want a cold beer!
I went to Kroger, but I had a hard time choosing which brand
to buy. Hmmmmmmmm.
Which brand do you think I bought?
And that reminds me of something, but I just can't remember...

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

One Shot Wednesday.....


You can drink it Icy or Hot, Creamy or Black.
Drink it all day? You can't 'Hit the Sack'!
It's Picked, then Dried, it's Ground, then Roasted.
It's then Brewed and Drank..With things that are Toasted!
Drink it occassionally, or drink it Daily.
Drink it with Kaluah, or try it with Bailey's.
It's morning Inspiration...An insomniacs Sensation!
It's the very 'Best Part of Waking-Up'...
And it's ALWAYS ...'Good to the Last Drop'!!


Hot Simmering Mud.
Percolated Perfection...
I'll have TWO creams please!


Got Poetry? Prose? Short Stories?
Is it Wednesday?.....Go Here!

Monday, January 24, 2011

TMI Tuesday....



No questions today...I'll do the talking!

This year we are experiencing FOUR unusual dates..



Also....How strange is this?
Take the last two digits of the year you were born,
plus the age that you will be this year...
They will equal.....111.
Stranger yet....divide 111 by 2!!!
Yeah....I know.

Sunday, January 23, 2011

Micro-Fiction Monday.....

There she is Little Skeeter.....Ohio!
I hear tell some of them homes have flush toilets!
(Ohio borders West Virginia...)
Every Monday the lovely Susan at Stony River, posts a pic
of her choice. You post the pic on your blog, then provide a
caption in 140 characters or less. When you are done, go tell her

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Friday Flash 55.....



Before the War, Gerard owned a business!

His company taught women how to mount and ride bicycles.

Few females rode bikes back then because it was considered

"unlady-like"! Ironically because of the metal shortage, some bikes

were built without the extra support bar.

Thus...The 'Girls Bike' was born, and Gerard's short-lived

profession ended!


I hear that Gerard finally got a job selling womens shoes!
If you or anyone you know has written a Friday Flash 55
Please come tell The G-Man...
I will visit, read, enjoy, comment...Then BOOK!!
So from the most gracious host from coast...
Have a Kick Ass Week-End!!!

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Thursday Portrait....

We have lots of Malibu's on the lot.
To help get rid of them, management is incentivizing
your commission on the older ones.
I sold one on Monday that was over 100 days old, so I got
to roll the dice. You got 2 rolls of the dice, and they paid
you 10 times the best of the two rolls. The last pic is my
second roll!!!
Thats an easy Hundo!!
Funny, that reminds me of something.....
See Ya Friday.

Tuesday, January 18, 2011


If you wanna keep old radios working...
One had better know how to test and replace old tubes!
I do indeed know and possess that technology...
Don't ya just LOVE the look and style of Retro Radios?

Monday, January 17, 2011

TMI Tuesday.....


Hi Kiddies....
Mr. Knowitall likes to keep things short and sweet.
You know, Friday Flash 55, Thursday Portrait, Etc.
I love to have folks just drop by, give a quick read,
smile, briefly comment (if you choose to), then move on!
I've always been a fan of themes, as some of you well know...
So to quote the notorious Buford "Bud" Light...'Here We Go'!

* A Priest, a Rabbi, and a Minister walk into a bar...
The bartender says, "Is this some kind of joke"?

* Thomas Edison walks into a bar...
The bartender says.."I'll serve you, but don't get any ideas"!

* A Jumper Cable walks into a bar, the bartender says...
"I'll serve you, but don't start anything"!

* A Termite walks into a bar... He says,"Is the Bartender here"?

* A baby Harp Seal walks into a bar...
He says..."I'll have ANYTHING but a Canadian Club"!!

*A guy walks into a bar and asks..."Do you have Helicopter
Flavored Potato Chips"? The bartender says..."Nope, only plain"!

* A Skunk walks into a bar and says..."Hey, where did everybody go"?

*An E-Flat walks into a bar, the bartender says...
"Sorry, we don't serve Minors here"!

* Two guys were sitting at a bar, one guy says to the other...
"Did you know that Lions mate 10-15 times a day"?
The other guys says..."Crap...I just joined The Kiwanis Club"!

* A Hamburger and a French Fry walks into a bar...
The bartender says..."Sorry, we don't serve food here"!

* Two Peanuts walk into a bar...One was a Salted!

* A guy walks into a bar with a slab of Asphalt under his arm..
He says to the bartender.." I'll have a beer, and gimme one for the Road"!

* A Skeleton walks into a bar and says..."I'll have a beer and a mop"!

* Julius Caesar walks into a bar and says..."I'll have a Martinus"!
The bartender says..."Don't you mean Martini"?
"Look pal, if I'd have wanted a double, I'd have asked for it"!!

* Jesus walks into a bar and says..."I'll just have some Water"!

* A guy with Dyslexia walks into a bra.....

* A Irishman walks BY a bar...Hey, it could happen!!!

* A guy is sitting at the bar and hears a voice...
"Nice pants"
He looks around and there is no one in sight!
A little later he hears..."Psst, Nice shoes"!
He looks around....Still no one!
He then hears..."Wow...Nice tie"!
Unable to stand it any, he asks the bartender...
"Excuse me, do YOU hear any strange voices"?
"Oh...Thats just the peanuts, they're complimentary"!!!

Mr. Knowitall grows weary from all of this plagiarised
jocularity, I bid you Adieu.....

Sunday, January 16, 2011

Micro-Fiction Monday.....

Although very brave, the era of the Parasol Samurai
was very short-lived!
Every Monday, the lovely Susan at Stony River
posts a picture of her choice. YOU provide a caption in 140
words or less. Post it on your blog, then go tell her......

Saturday, January 15, 2011

Coffee Talk 160.....


Yes...It's what you think!
That'll last me 20 years hehehehe!
I think I'll do a 160 for the MONKEY MAN!!
Please visit him for some cool stuff.
Here's my True Confession 160.....


Words that make me Smirk.
Frito-Lay. Smuckers. Lake Titicacca,
Homo Milk. Merkin. Jewish men named Hymen.
Cockysville Md. Pussy Willow (I know...Sorry).

Thursday, January 13, 2011

Friday Flash 55.....


I understand your dilemma!
You've worked hard these past four years
to bring useless information and a smile to DOZENS
of people from all over the World.
But remember... You have a full-time job, AND a real
3-D life! Cut back on your 'obsession', and concentrate
on Your Baby...Friday Flash 55!!!
Five Cents Please.....


So there it is in a nutshell... I'll still visit my friends,
And I'll occassionally play in some prompts from around
Blogdom. But I'm NOT letting my Sales and private life
suffer because I have self imposed "obligations".
I'm still irrevrently around, and It will ALWAYS be business
as usual on Fridays...
So if you or anyone you know has written a Friday Flash 55
Please come tell The G-Man!
I will visit, read, enjoy, comment....Then BOOK!
So from the most gracious host from coast to coast...
Have a Kick Ass Week-End!!!

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Thursday Portrait....

Here's a fuzzy phone pic...
This has been a fuzzy week!
Now I know that there is something going on here on Friday.
But the details are a bit fuzzy...
Maybe some of you can visit on Friday and help clear things up?

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Retro Wednesday......

Whens the last time that you've seen a Take-Out
Pizza in a brown bag? That the way they came
Pre cardboard box.
Family owned and operated since the Mid-50's, their
crust is so chewy.... and delicious hot AND cold!!
See how pliable the crust is? Not stiff and thick like
the franchise places.
This pizza really takes me back to my childhood.
Just as it does my son Reese.

Monday, January 10, 2011

Tired Tuesday.....

Sorry....I had a long tough day!
Thanks for stopping by and checking in though!

Sunday, January 9, 2011

Coffee Talk....

Extra large regular coffee with double cream.
With a Senior Discount.... $1.62.

Here's something to talk about....
What TV commercial annoy's you the most right now?
For me it's that State Farm dude with that INCESSANT
whistling in the background!
Do any of you have one?

Did anyone remember seeing The Clapper Lady this
past Holiday season?
OMG!!!! Do you think she finally passed away at age 128?

Thursday, January 6, 2011

Friday Flash 55.....


So, he says to me......
"Margaret, my employer is sending me out of
the country for a year, I hope you understand".
He hands me a strand of pearls, gives me a kiss
on the cheek, and he's GONE!
Uh Huh.....
I've got news for you big boy.
I'm NOT so easily discarded....You'll find out!


Ooooh, she does have THAT look doesn't she?
If you or anyone you know has written a Friday Flash 55
Please come tell The G-Man!
I will visit, read, enjoy, comment....Then BOOK!!!
So from the most nervous host from coast to coast....
Have a Kick Ass Week-End!!!

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Thursday Portrait.....



The lack of snow for a January 5th is freaky!
Thats supposed to change in the next few days.
My hair is growing back just fine thank you.
My Samson Complex ya know....
I'm almost ready to smite a few Philistines!!!
Ready for tomorrow Y'all??
I Am.....Later!

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

One Shot Wednesday.....

Today we are talking Cento....
No.... NOT the above pictured Centos!
Cento is Latin for patchwork.
It's a poetic form that consists of lines...
Made up from lines of other poets!
My One Shot Wednesday entry this week was from
the works of Shakespeare, Byron, Matthew Arnold, and Poe.
Come to me in my dreams....
Shall I compare you to a Summer's day?
Thou were more lovely and more temperate.
The smiles that win.
The tints that glow.
A heart whose love was innocent.
In visions of the dark night
I have dreamed of joy departed
But a waking dream of life and light
Hath left me broken hearted.
For so the night will more than pay
For the hopeful longings of the day.
Come to me in my dreams.....
If it's Wednesday, and you have any Poetry,
Prose, or Short Stories lying around.
Post it on your blog, then go tell the very talented
crew over at One Stop Poetry....Here!
They are quite gracious!

Monday, January 3, 2011

Outta My Mouth....

1. You can't make any money by laying on the coutch.
2. As long as you are reading the obituaries instead
of staring in them .....It's OK!
3. I hate puke, and ALL talk of puke.
4. Dickweed!!!
5. No Thanks...It gives me 'The Wind'.
6. How did I know that the 10 of Diamonds was The Big Casino?
7. Nice Shirt......Couldn't guess your weight at the Carnival?
8. May I have some Mustard AND Strawberry Jelly with that
Sausage McMuffin please?
9. Nobody ever looked intelligent chewing gum.
10. You've NEVER had a Peanut Butter and Bacon Sandwich?

Sunday, January 2, 2011

Micro-Fiction Monday.....

Please try our grease from Texico
It's made right here in Mexico.
It's good for your Car
It's good for your Cheeks
It's good for your Hinges
It's good for your Squeeks!
Every Monday the lovely Susan from Stony River
posts a pic. You provide the caption in 140 characters
or less. Post it on your blog, and go tell her ....Here!
Try it, it's fun!