Monday, May 31, 2010

TMI Tuesday.....

A Mr. Petite Oui-Oui from Richard du Tete France asks...
"Dear Mr. Knowitall...As you know French nouns are either male or female. La Bouche is female it means the mouth, Le Bras is masculine and it means the arm....The list goes on and on.
My American Cousin tells me that certain English words are genderized as well. I didn't learn this in school...Can you give me any examples if this is true?"
'Dear Froggy...Of course I can'!!
COPY MACHINES...Female: Once they are turned off, they take a while to warm them up again. They are highly effective and useful if the right buttons are pushed. Push the wrong button, and all Hell breaks loose!
FREEZER BAGS...Male: They hold everything in, and you can see right thru them!
TIRES...Male: The go bald easily, and they are usually Over-Inflated.
SPONGES...Female: They are soft, squeezable, and they retain a lot of water!
TRAINS...Male: They use the same old over-used lines for picking up people.
EGG TIMERS...Female: After a while, all their weight shifts to the bottom.
HAMMERS...Male: In the last 5000 years they have hardly changed at all, and at times are handy.
THE REMOTE...Female? I know...Surprise!! Think about it.....It easily gives a man pleasure, he'd be lost without it, and while he doesn't always know what buttons to push, he just keeps pushing away!!
I hope that answered your question Frenchy, if not? C'est Dommage
Je suis fatige'....A bientot.


Brian Miller said... this g-man.

Serena said...

Well, I have to admit, that makes pretty good sense to me. I believe you gave Mr. Frenchy his money's worth.:)

lime said...

and i reckon we have neuter forms too, like they do in german. scissors qualify, i suppose.

Donda said...

That was awesome!

Anonymous said...

OMG I fell off my damn chair reading this. LOL It is just too funny :) Retain water...damn!!! LOL This is the best advice column I've ever read. Dear Abby move over. Dear G-Man is crushing you!!!

One Prayer Girl said...

This is perfect for me to read on a morning when I am feeling not exactly my normal bubbly self. It made me laugh.

An egg-timer....please say it isn't so, but alas, I think it truly is a feminine noun. :(


A Daft Scots Lass said...

LOL a spare......heehee

clean and crazy said...

i love it!! check out todays post i kind of was thinking of you when i posted it!! hope you like it!!

Shadow said...

aaaaah, a lesson i'd never learn in school i suspect.... well done!

Megzone said...

hey G-man.. i have posted a 55 fiction :D
Jingle suggested i link it up with you :)

here's the link
do leave in your comments

Lulda Casadaga said...

Well, I never tire of hearing this joke! I'm feelin kinda spongy today!! :D Have a great Tuesday!

buffalodick said...

Egg timer is my take away for today!

petra michelle; Whose role is it anyway? said...

I just cannot stop laughing! That was hilarious! :))

Mona said...

Copy machines are females because they take a while to warm up once they are turned off?

I thought that was true for Male organ isation !

drybottomgirl said...

My favorite is the freezer bag, next time I use one I'll laugh out loud in honor of you g-man!

secret agent woman said...

I'm going to have to give you credit for bashing men and women equally.

(I personally like the spare idea.)