Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Fire On The Roof...Fire In The Furnace.......

Mr. Knowitall is taking the night off folks, I hope you are not disappointed...
As many of you know, The G-Man has an ' affection ' toward certain things. Pretty Feet, U of M football, cooking, and of course..Redheads!!
I'm gonna tell a joke regarding Redheads, and I'd like a joke in return, but it doesn't have to be about any particular hair color....Henna color will do...hehehehe
A man is dining in a fancy restaurant, and there is a gorgeous Redhead sitting at the next table. He has been checking her out since he sat down, but lacks the nerve to talk to her...
Suddenly she sneezes, and her glass eye comes flying out it's socket toward the man. He reflexively reaches out, grabs it in mid air, and hands it back to her.
"Oh my, I am so sorry", the woman says as she pops it back into place.
"I'm sure that this must have embarrassed you, so please let me buy your dinner to make it up to you" she says.
They enjoy a wonderful dinner together, and afterwards they go to the theater followed by drinks. They talk, they laugh, she shares her deepest dreams and he listens, he shares his and she listens. After paying for everything , she asked him up to her place for a nightcap and stay for breakfast.
They have a wonderful WONDERFUL time!
The next morning she cooks a gourmet breakfast with all the trimmings. The guy is amazed and totally impressed, everything had been soooo incredible.
"You know...You are the perfect woman" he says.." Are you this nice to every guy you meet"?
"No" she replies..."You just happened to catch my eye".
Joke please.... Peace!
(or if you are Hosed...just say Hi..)


Serena said...

Hmmmm. Hi. Hoser? I can't cook worth a hoot and don't know much about football, but I do have red hair and love redhead jokes. And that one made me laugh. I wish I could remember a good joke for you, but I'm drawing a blank.:-)xoxo

G-Man said...

OK..Typo slang...?
I'm an idiot...what does this mean :-)..huh?
You are a Redhead??

Serena said...

What does the doohickey mean? It's a big grin, silly.:-) Yes. Really. Weird, huh?:)

barman said...

I found this and kind of liked it...

A man doing market research knocked on a door and was greeted by a redhead with three small children running around at her feet.

He said, "I'm doing some research for Vaseline. Have you ever used the product?"

She said, "Yes. My husband and I use it all the time."

"And if you don't mind me asking, what do you use it for?"

"We use it for sex."

The researcher was a little taken aback.

He said, "Usually people lie to me and say that they use it on a child's bicycle chain or to help with a gate hinge. But, in fact, I know that most people do use it for sex. I admire you for your honesty. Since you've been frank so far, can you tell me exactly how you use it for sex?"

The redhead said, "I don't mind telling you at all. My husband and I put it on the door knob and it keeps the kids out."

Cazzie!!! said...

Love it Galen :)

SignGurl said...

How come redheads get to be smart?

lime said...

LMAO!!! ok, that was a good one.

i don't have a joke but i have a mildly amusing anecdote that is related.

a friend of ours has a daughter with a glass eye. she lost the eye to cancer as an infant so as she grew she had to regularly be checked and refitted. one day when she and her brother were young they went tot the eye institute for a refit and the little brother got very jealous that his sister got a new eye and he didn't. he threw a bit of a fit and the parents were trying to tell him it was a good thing he didn't need a new eye. the eye doctor thought it was all pretty funny so he pulled out a drawer of what i suppose were eyeballs he couldn't use for whatever reason. he told the boy to pick out a few to have to play with. all the way home he made weird googly eyes out the car window to the horror of other drivers on the schuylkill expressway.

G-Man said...

A big grin eh?
Amazing what one can learn on the web....
Thanks ..xox

I love this joke..Thanks

Thanks Nurse Cazzie...

C'Mon, you are smart talented and beautiful, what more do you need?

G-Man said...

I love your mildly amusing anecdotes...

Little Wing said...

Rebicmel, good one!!!!!

A man and a woman were driving down the road arguing
about his deplorable infidelity.
Suddenly the woman reaches over
and slices off the man's pecker.
Angrily the woman tosses the pecker
out the window of the car.
Driving behind the car is a fella in a pickup truck
with his 10 year old daughter chatting
away beside him. All of the sudden,
the pecker smacks the pickup in the
windshield and flies off.
Surprised, the daughter asks
her daddy, "Daddy what in the heck was that?" Not
wanting to expose his 10 year old
daughter to sex at such a tender age,
the father replies, "It was only a bug, honey."
The daughter gets a confused look on
her face, and after a minute she says
"Sure had a big dick!"

G-Man said...

Thank You Missy for successfully fulfilling the request...xox

I LOVED that joke...

Cha Cha said...

Hi, Galen.

I don't know what being 'hosed' is....but I felt like I wanted to be 'hosed.'

I LOVE that joke, well, you know....cos I dig on the red-headed lovelies myself.

Especially those with interesting eyes....



I like it.

javajazz said...

i too, must confess, that this term
Hoser has a connotation i do not fully
comprehend, possibly because
Galen has created his own version
of what it means,
but somewhat like Strumpie,
i am interested in
seeing some hoses, tho' i am not
quite certain i would like to
be hosed directly before
i check out the goods...
...i suppose it depends
if i like what i see...

ps. hi


Charles said...

from comedycentral.com:

What's the difference between a Porsche and a hedgehog?

A hedgehog has its pricks on the outside.

SignGurl said...

Ok, here is the definition of a "hoser":

slang. 1. noun: (deragatory) an oaf, or simpleton. 2. noun: (friendly) a friend, brother or faithful companion. 3. verb: hose-off; a put-off; go away, leave me; I doubt what you are saying. History: The term originates from a syndicated television comedy about a fictional television station: 'Second City Television Station' or 'SCTV.' Comedy skits on the show were presented as actual programs. One such skit was a program entitled "the Great White North" - the hosts, comedians Rick Moranis and Dave Thomas (portraying Bob and Doug MacKenzie), embellished and exaggerated the stereotypical American image of how Canadians talk and act. The characters (Bob and Doug) drank beer, while bantering back and forth, inflecting their speech heavily with 'eh?' and the occasional 'hoser.'

Back off you hoser!

Come here hoser, I was just kidding.

You're welcome :)

tsduff said...

How do you get a redhead's mood to change?
Wait 10 seconds

Okay, there's my one and only redhead joke. All my nieces and nephews in Wyoming have carrot red hair, and I love them to pieces.

happy hump day Galen.

G-Man said...

Hi Strumpie!!!
I hope school is going well..
Consider yourself Hosed!

Hi Yourself
Ms Houdini....
You are Very Hosed!!!
Take off eh?
And while you are up, could I please have a Molson Golden?

Hey brother, great to see you and thanks for contributing....G

WOW!! Barmans really rubbing off on you!!!
(Not literally)
Thanks for all that background info...G

I love Redhead jokes!!
Thanks for playing, and I'm really glad to see you...xox

morgetron said...

Why did the cookie go to the doctor?

morgetron said...

Why did the cookie go to the doctor?

morgetron said...

Because he was feeling crummy.

morgetron said...