Sunday, April 29, 2007

Hello Darlin'..................

Our dear friend Susie, ( aka. The Barefoot Mistress ) always posts a thing called Musical Monday.. Since I am not High-Tech enough to download Rufus Wainwright off of You-Tube, I thought it would be fun to examine some actual Country Music song titles. So without further ado, may I please present the songs that give Country Music the stereotype that it so richly deserves....

" Get Your Tongue Outta my Mouth,
Cause I'm Kissing You Goodbye".

" She Made Toothpicks, Outta The
Timber Of My Heart."

" Your The Reason Our Kids Are So Ugly."

" It Ain't Love, But It Ain't Bad."

" I've Been Flushed From The Bathroom Of Your Heart"

" I'm The Only Hell Mama Ever Raised"

" I Got In At 2 With A 10,
And Woke Up At 10 With A 2"

" If You See Me Gettin Smaller,
It's Cause I'm Leaving You"

" If Heartaches Were Wine,
I'd Be Drunk All The Time "

" I've Got The Hungries For Your Love,
And I'm Waiting In Your Welfare Line"

" The Last Word In Lonesome Is Me"

" I'll Marry You Tomorrow,
But Let's Honeymoon Tonight"

" You Stuck My Heart in an Old Tin Can,
and Shot It Off The Log"

"Touch Me With More Than Your Hands"

"When We Get Back To The Farm,
Thats When We Really Go To Town"

" I Don't Know Whether To Come Home,
Or Go Crazy"
" I Don't Know Whether to Kill Myself,
or Go Bowling"

" If Fingerprints Showed Up On Skin,
Wonder Whose I'd Find On You"

"Why Do You Believe That I Love You,
When I've Been a Liar All My Life"

" He's Been Drunk Since His Wifes Gone Punk"

Yeah, I feel a lot better now........Could I have another beer and a shot please?


Cazzie!!! said...

PMSL, I am just cracking up here Galen.
Look, when I had cable TV I used to watch CMT alot, and , I always cried with every video clip I reckon, every song is just so sad, but, it was addictive!!!

Mona said...

Hello Darlin..[ chuckles]

some of these can be quotable quotes...must save them!

G-Man said...

Cazzie, After a Country Music video, your own life doesn't seem so bad does it?

Hello Mona....
Do they have Country Music in India?

MilkMaid said...

Oh God, MilkMan LUUUUUVS to sing "Your Cheatin Heart". More like screeching twang. LOL

Good Monday Morning G. Ride any this weekend? We are nursing minor raccoon sunburns this morning. And the tops of my hands.


G-Man said...

Mornin Milkmaid,
Raccoon Sunburns eh?
I've had a few of those!
Yeah, this week-end it was perfect to ride..

Mona said...

Galen, we do have what is called Folk music in india.
Indian music is very different from western music. It is 'harmonised' while western music is 'organised'. oOur musical instuments are very different and so are the notes.Although the basic notes do re me fa so la ti do are same as Indian sa re ga ma pa dha ni sa.
Our classical music is very regional.The pure classical comprises of raga from the ancient times, which were improvised upon by the great Mughal musician Tansen.I wonder if you are aware of this, but even rap springs from Indian classical music, which was sung to the beat of our mridangam & tabla.[ special Indian drums]. Sitar, Veena, & baansuri[ bamboo flute] are some of the inventions of India.Also, there is Santoor[ a very ancient form of xylophone] . Our Vaadans[ instrumental music] is one of the best in the world.
But Folk music,[ country] exists in diverse variety. There is as much of that as our states [ about 30]. Each one in a different language.[ Do you know that in India we have more than 22 lingual & bilingual variety]. Our's is a country of varied culture & a perfect example of Unity in Diversity.
The kashmiri folk is the usual weding variety & the sufi music sung in more than three bi linguals. The Rajasthani folk is accompanied to Dance called Kalbelia.& Gujarati has the Garbha dance music. The maharashtarans have their own Tamasha music in marathi language, & Karnatic music is very classical in tone & substance. So also Bengali music.
The place I stay has some very cute folk songs.They are usually wedding songs called lok geet.
Music is one of the form of parayers in India, so it is taken very seriously. Amongst Hindus, The girls from each house is trained specially in music lesson & it is a matter of great pride for the in laws that they get a daughter in law who can sing & dance.
& we have some naughty music too sung by the villagers, with too many sexual connotations, which they sing at the weddings here.One night before a wedding, the women of the house spend singing and dancing. & their songs are kind that[ believe it or not] slander the other party [ bride's or bridegroom's]. They hurl abuses of worst kind at the others via folk music, & the party that can hurl the most abuses is a clear winner.The abuses must have sexual connotations.
I guess this is a kind of 'moodmaking' for the bride & the bridegroom, who poor people are ignorant as the darkest night on topic of sex. You won't believe it, There was this young couple, who did not have children for two years & they were taken to the doctor's & the doctor found out that they thought that poenetration was through the navel !! Can you believe the level of ignorance about the topic here!So that music is supposed to 'enlighten, the poor young ignorant souls.

G-Man said...

Mona you give the greatest history lessons regarding your country.
Can YOU sing and dance?
I bet you can, and I bet you are awesome.
This is from me to you..
((((Big Galen Hug ))))

Anonymous said...

LOL..these are very good examples of old country songs.:)
I feel much better about things

Mona said...

Galen..I do sing..on the stage too :)

& do dancing a bit too...

Do you know, the goddess of Art & music & knowledge is called Saraswati over here.

G-Man said...

TC, Country is, as Country does...

Mona? You are My Saraswati!!!
OK, someone has had to have video taped you on stage...I think we all deserve a peek!

mist1 said...

Country music song titles are the best.

" I've Got The Hungries For Your Love, And I'm Waiting In Your Welfare Line"

That's just excellent.

jillie said...

This is ONE reason why I don't listen to country...too damn depressing!


No shot and a beer quite yet for

lime said...

ROFLMAO!!! great list there g-man.

i can remmeber my mom singing one she heard on the radio when i was a kid too.

'i work my fingers to the bone and what do i get? bony fingers'

'you can eat crackers in my bed anytime'

'if you leave me can i come along'

with that i will end with a joke. what happens when you play country music backrwards?

you git yer dog back, yer truck back, yer wife back....

cathy said...

Her Teeth Was Stained, But Her Heart Were Pure.

How Can I Miss You If You Won't Go Away?

I Just Bought A Car From A Guy That Stole My Girl, But The Car Don’t Run So I Figure We're Even.

I Keep Forgettin' I Forgot About You.

I Liked You Better Before I Knew You So Well.

I Still Miss You, Baby, But My Aim's Gettin' Better.

I Wouldn't Take Her To A Dog Fight, Cause I'm Afraid She'd Win.

I'm So Miserable Without You, It's Like Having You Here

I've Got Tears In My Ears From Lyin' On My Back and Cryin' Over You.

If I Can't Be Number One In Your Life, Then Number Two On You.

If I Had Shot You When I Wanted To, I'd Be Out By Now.

Mama Get A Hammer (There's A Fly On Papa's Head)

My Head Hurts, My Feet Stink, And I Don't Love You.

My Wife Ran Off With My Best Friend And I Sure Do Miss Him

Please Bypass This Heart

She Got The Ring And I Got The Finger.

You Done Tore Out My Heart And Stomped That Sucker Flat.

If the Phone Don't Ring, You'll Know It's Me.

She's Actin' Single and I'm Drinkin' Doubles.

She's Looking Better After Every Beer.

Haven't Gone To Bed With Any Ugly Women But I've Sure Woke Up With A Few

barman said...

Don't they tell you to play country songs backwards so that you will get your truck back, your dog back, your wife back, yadda, yadda, yadda?

Fun list there G.

Breazy said...

I LOVE country music but I don't recall every hearing any of those songs however, I have to give it to you, those were funny!

Hope your weekend was good!

Queenie said...

That was brillant, you do make giggle!!!!

KJ said...

I can't believe you're knockin' country :)

Country music rocks

SignGurl said...

Oh, yes, they call him the streak......Boogety...boogety.

That was a fun one.

Mona said...

Cathy, Lime, Those were great, you have me in splits, just like Galen had us all in splits.You all make me laugh so much. Thank you all!!!

Mona said...

Galen, Please wish Breazy happy Birthday, It was on Sunday!

G-Man said...

Mist1, I remember you...Thanks for visiting again....Galen

Jillie, no one told you to drink till you puke!

Limey, Those were excellent titles also..
Country Music backwards..LOL xoxox

Cathy? WTF?
You got more titles than I do!..Thanks for contibuting to the fun!!

Barman...Have you been hanging out with lime?
Did you bring back any Bourbon from Kentucky?

Happy Birthday....YAY!!

I love being visited by Royalty!
Thanks....Galen xox

Hey I didn't write those songs KJ. I'm glad that you like Country Music..
I like things that make you happy..xoxoxox

Hi Jenn! Long time no see!
I remember that Ray Stevens song...

Mona, thanks for the Birthday heads up on our dear friend Breazy..xox

Spoony Quine said...

` I never knew Loudon Wainwright III had a son! I know for a fact his song titles include 'Dead Skunk in the Middle of the Road' (I have that one) and 'I Wish I Were a Lesbian.'
` Sadly, though he's a tremendous actor/musician and has been on many well-known TV shows and in movies like the Aviator... he's most popular for this. So sad.

Breazy said...

LOL! thank you Mona and thank you Galen!

I was reading some of the comments on here and Lime has one about "what do you get when you play a country song backwards" , my favorite country band, Rascal Flatts, have a song about that and it is hilarious!

I am going out of town on business tomorrow and I won't be back until Thursday evening so just want to let you know that I will miss you and the gang!

Okay I am off to Mona's blog because I just have to add her to my blog roll!


G-Man said...

Sequin, I have enjoyed that song for many years, thanks for using your High-Tech Mastery to bring it to my low tech blog...You Rock!!

Happy Birthday again!!

S said...

How Can I Miss You When You Wont Go Away?

Sorry about missing Musical Monday and Rufus...just didnt have time...

G-Man said...

Your working way too much!