I'm Over It 55........

With-out a snowmobile or ski's, it's hard to have fun.
No sailing, no baseball, no grilling...NO FUN!
The days are too short.
The driveways a mess.
No beautiful redheads, in a cute Summer dress.
Depressing mood swings, range from anger to silly.
Most of your fruit....Is a Product of Chile!
CABIN FEVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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If you or anyone you know has written a Friday Flash 55, please come tell The G-Man.
I will visit, read, enjoy, comment...THEN BOOK!
So from the most gracious host from coast to coast... Have a Great Week-End!
Peace...!!!

Thursday Portrait........

Hi everybody....Business has been crazy lately!
It seems that ever since the 'bailout,' the banks have been quite generous in lending money for car loans. This is me at the BP filling up a brand new Silverado for a customer today.
I've been doing a lot of this lately.....YAY!!!!!
I hope you are all thinking about your Friday Flash 55.
Peace...!!!

Retro-Wednesday......

Ahhhh Stroh's.

Some of you may remember when Coors Beer was only distributed West of the Mississippi. During that same time, Detroits own Stroh's Beer was only sold in 17 states East of the Mississippi. It was quite a 'coup' to be seen sipping a Coors at a Summer picnic in Michigan pre-1980. As it was just as 'cool' to be chuggin on a Stroh's out West.

Stroh's was quite a cultural phenomena in it's day, they stayed afloat during Prohibition by making "Near Beer", and by making Stroh's Ice Cream. At one time after Stroh's bought the Schaeffer Brewing Co. they were the 3rd largest brewer in the country circa 1978. But hard times hit, and in 1999 The Pabst Brewing Co. bought them out. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

Anyway, thats my brass Stroh's belt buckle from the sixties in the top pic.

I loved Stroh's, but since it is no longer brewed with Detroit River water, it just doesn't taste the same. I can remember what we always said after tipping a few Stroh's Beers at a fraternity party back at college..." Enjoy it now, cause tomorrow you'll have a 'Fire Brewed Asshole'."!!

Peace...!!!

This Says It All.......

If you know me at all, you can figure this out.

Peace...!!!

All Are Welcome......

THE ACROBATS

I'll swing

By my ankles,

She'll cling

To your knees

As you hang

By your nose

From a high-up

Trapeze.

But just one thing, please,

As we float through the breeze-

Don't sneeze.

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Hi Everybody....The other day I was talking with someone about poetry, writing, and artistic expression on our blogs. It's obvious that some bloggers are very talented. If you've ever read any story by James Goodman, ever read any poem by Mona or Shadow, ever read a novel by Serena, ever seen any photography by Barman, the quilting talents of Lime, or gasped at the culinary genius of Uncle Buff, you know exactly what I'm talking about. I made the statement that if poetry and writing were your K thru 12 Education, I'd be in Pre-School!!!!!

I guess with that thought in mind, the late great Shel Silverstein rings a bell .

He wrote songs such as "Freakin At The Freaker's Ball..."A Boy Named Sue", and many many other silly little ditties. (As well as the pictured above classics). So when any of you may think that your artistic talent isn't worthy of a post, just remember...Sometimes there is Great Beauty in Simplicity....

Have a Wonderful Week....Peace...!!!

Friday Flash 55.....

As he bellied up to the bar, he perused the assorted booze selection that his favorite dive had to offer....Black Velvet, Crown, Wild Turkey.

Finally the barmaid saw him and hollored, "What'll ya have hon"?

'I'll have a Rosie O'Donnell'

"A what"......?

'You know, it's quite large, and usually comes with two liquors'!!!

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If you or anyone you know has written a Friday Flash 55, please come tell The G-Man.

I will visit, read, enjoy, comment, Then BOOK!!! So from the most gracious host from coast to coast, have a GREAT WEEK-END!

Also...The lovely and talented Mona is visiting her son away at college for a few days, and has posted a Friday 55 a bit early. She has invited everyone to come and read her contribution.

Lastly, our Kiwi friend KB also has posted a 55 already. Since I'm very low-tech and cannot do a link, she commented last on my previous post, she is very talented as well, please visit her.

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Peace...!!!

As Promised, Retro-Thursday......

Louisville Slugger...Circa 1975

Johnny Bench Model...

I've seen them on E-Bay for 500 Bucks.

Of Course......Yada Yada Yada...hehehehe

Peace...!!!

Mixed Up Mid-Week........

We've broomed and moved and plowed so much snow this week that we had to hire a company to come in and cart it away. This was taken when the temp was -2.

Ummmm, guess what? I got my days mixed up. This was supposed to be Thursday Portrait. I guess this week you'll have Retro Thursday tomorrow. Ooooooops!

Peace...!!!

You Know What I'm Missin.........

Hi everybody....I'm sure you all know by now that the G-Man LOVES his Harley! I owned a Motorcycle before I owned a car, but that doesn't necessarily mean that I'm a Biker! Just to clear up any confusion about the term "Biker", here are a few guidelines that may clear up the subject...

YOU KNOW YOU'RE A BIKER IF.......

*Your wife has asked you to move your bike so she can see the TV.

*Your best friends are named after reptiles!

*You own more black T-Shirts than underwear.

*Taking your wife on a cruise means going to Bike Nite.

*Sturgis is your dream vacation.

*You ever quit a job to go to Sturgis.

*You only took a job to pay for the trip to Sturgis.

*Your only 3-Piece suit is a leather jacket, leather vest, and chaps.

*Your "ole lady" can only eat a hot dog if it's suspended from a string above your bike.

*You buy any newborn, Harley-Jammies

*You can identify any bug by it's taste.

*You think Black and Orange would make great house colors.

*You think God invented Winter just so you can have your bike painted.

*People know your a biker even though you don't want them to.

*One of your children or pets have either Harley or Davidson in their name.

*People have nearly died of starvation looking at your Bike Trip Pics.

*Over half of the pics that you take have your bike in it.

*You don't go one single day without wearing SOMETHING that says Harley-Davidson.

*The weather is too bad for riding, so you start your bike up and sit on it in the garage.

*You see no use in going to a bar without bikes parked out front.

*You get hit by a car, break your leg, then tell the cop.."I'm OK, I can ride home".

*You stare longer at the pictures of the bikes in "EASYRIDERS", than you do the naked chicks !

Whew, I got blisters on my fingers...More next week!

Peace...!!!

The Man Rules.......

Hi everybody, I hope you had a Great Week-End...I sure did!!

We all know that in most households there are "Rules".

These decree's must be abided by or else your life becomes...HELL!!

Let us imagine for one brief moment that a lucid, clear-thinking adult male, with just a smidgin of common sense, set some "Rules" of his own to abide by.

Let us journey into fantasy land shall we?............

(All Rules are Rule #1)

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1. Men are NOT mind readers!

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down do you?

1. SUNDAY SPORTS. It's like the Moon, or the changing of the tides. Let it be!

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want! Let us be clear:

Subtle hints do not work.

Strong hints do not work.

Obvious hints do not work.

Just say it!!!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to most questions.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. Thats what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments are null and void after 7 days.

1. If you 'think' you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad and angry...we meant the other one.

1. You can either ask us to do something, or tell us how you want it done. NOT BOTH! If you already know how to do it...do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, please say anything you have to say during the commercial break.

1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we!

1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing", we will act like nothing is wrong. We know you are lying, but it's not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to. Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...Really!

1. Don't ask us what we are thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as football, motorcycles, and sex.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I AM in shape...Round is a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this. And yes, I am prepared to sleep on the couch!

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Peace...!!!

Friday Flash 55...

At 4:30 AM, like so many nights before, she was "out" with girlfriends. In the past if she did come home, she smelled of Marlboro Reds, booze, and Brut. Startled by a noise in the garage, he checked. There she was, passed out....Car running.

Smiling, he closed the garage door, and went to bed!

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If you or anyone you know has written a Friday Flash 55, please come tell the G-Man.

I will visit, read, enjoy, comment, then Book! So from the most gracious host from coast to coast, have a Wonderful Week-End.

Peace...!!!

Thurrrrrrrrrrrsday Porrrrrrrrtrait........

Hi everybody....At 4:00 PM when this photo was taken, it was EXACTLY 30 degree's warmer then it was just 12 hours earlier...and at 4 it was 11 degree's. Yes folks thats correct, it was a Frigid -19 degree's actual Temperature this morning...

I need a Warm Vacation!!.........

Peace...!!!

Retro Wednesday....

As a kid, did you ever have ground up Bologna and pickles mixed with mayo?

Or ground up roast beef?...No? Boy, did you miss out!

Anyway....This little kitchen tool has been around a LONG time, I lovingly refer to it as the very first 'food processor', hahahaha....G

Peace...!!!

TMI Tuesday.....;

Hi Everybody.....

Do y'all remember Granny Clampett from the Beverly Hillbillies?

Of course you do! But do you remember that she was also "Dr. Granny"?

Ya know, sometimes there is a lot to be said for Country Doctorin.

Not only did she have her own 'Special Medicine', she had a very unique interpretation of certain medical terms. For instance.......

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ARTERY: The study of paintings.

BACTERIA: The rear of a cafeteria.

BARIUM: What you do with dead folks.

BENIGN: What you be after eight.

BOWEL: A letter like A E I O U.

CATSCAN: Searchin for the cat.

CAUTERIZE: Made eye contact with her.

CAESARIAN SECTION: A neighborhood in Rome.

COLIC: A sheep dog.

COMA: A punctuation mark.

D&C: Where Washington is.

DILATE: To live longer than your kids.

ENEMA: Not a friend.

FESTER: Quicker than someone else.

FIBULA: A small lie.

GENITAL: Not a Jew.

HANGNAIL: A coat hook.

IMPOTENT: Distinguished.

MORBID: A higher offer than mine.

NITRATES: Cheaper than day rates.

NODE: Was aware of.

PAP SMEAR: A fatherhood test.

PELVIS: Second cousin to Elvis.

RECOVERY ROOM: A place to do upholstery.

RECTUM: (All together now) Damn near killed him!

SECRETION: Hiding something.

SEIZURE: Roman General that lived in the Caesarian Section.

TERMINAL ILLNESS: Getting sick at the train station.

TUMOR: More than one.

URINE: Opposite to...Your Out!

VARICOSE: Near by.

VEIN: Uppity

VARICOSE VEINS: Near by AND uppity!

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Take your shoes off, stay awhile, Y'all come back now hear...

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Peace...!!!

Oh...A Wise Guy!!

Hi Everybody....I hope you all had a swell Week-End.

Fridays 55 about the 'Wise' Confuciousism's, went over so well that maybe a few more words to the wise are in order....Ready?

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It's always darkest before the dawn...

So if you are going to steal your neighbors newspaper, thats the time to do it!

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Don't be irreplaceable.....

If you can't be replaced, you WON'T be promoted!

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Always remember that you are unique....

Just like everyone else!

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NEVER test the depths of the water with both feet!

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If you think that no one cares if you are alive...

Try missing a couple of car payments!

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If at first you don't succeed...

Sky Diving is probably not for you!

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Give a man a fish, and he will eat for a day...

Teach him how to fish, then he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day!

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Some days your the bug...

Some days your the windshield!

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Everyone seems normal...

Until you get to know them.

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The quickest way to double your money...

Is to fold it in half, and put it in your back pocket!

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A closed mouth gathers no foot!

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There are two theories about arguing with women...

Neither one works!!

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Experience is somethng you don't get until just after you need it!

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Generally speaking, you aren't learning much if your lips are moving!

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And finally....Never criticize someone unless you walk a mile in their shoes.

That way if you DO criticize them, you are a mile away, AND you have their shoes!

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Peace...!!!

Friday Flash 55.....

Confucious was very wise for his time.
But I think a few updates are in order...
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"Man who stand on toilet, is high on pot".

"Virginity like bubble, one prick, all gone".

"Man who scratch ass, should NOT bite fingernails".

"Baseball is wrong: Man with 4 balls cannot walk".

"Crowded elevator, smell different to midget".
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If you or anyone you know has written a Friday Flash 55, please come tell The G-Man!
I will visit, read, enjoy, comment, then BOOK!
So from the most gracious host from coast to coast, please have a Great Week-End!!
Peace...!!!

Thursday Portrait.....

I've actually had this haircut about a week or so.

Oh well...It'll always grow back.

Start thinking about your Friday 55 kiddies, vacations OVER!!!!

Peace...!!!

Retro-Wednesday.....

This was supposed to replace cassette tapes back in the Eighties. It's a format called the Mini-Cassette. This particular little item was called the Pocket Rocker. I believe I got this for 75% off in 1988. It came with 2 taped songs...La Bomba, and Tequila.

....of course, New In The Box!! Never Opened...hehehehe

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Peace...!!!

Oxy This...Bitch!

Hi Everybody.....

Last week I was annoyed to no end about that stupid SNUGGIE commercial.

This week it's a toss-up. With my deepest apologies and envy to Ake and Shadow that have never seen these two yahoo's, which of these two TV pitch-men make you reach for the remote first?

As you can see, I have nothing of substance to post..Sorry.

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Peace...!!!

Good Bye Holidays........

Hi Everybody....I don't think I've ever been so glad to have a Holiday Season over in my life! With the horrible economic news, the trouble in the Middle East, Our beautiful Liquids untimely death, poor John Travolta's unspeakable tragedy...ON WITH 2009!!!!

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With every New Year, there are usually some "Resolutions" to be attempted for a week or two anyway. As you can tell by my cartoons, I definately have weight loss on my mind...

I have a game plan, we'll see how it goes.

Winter is depressing me...I need to go golfing!!

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Peace...!!!

2008 In Memorium 55.......

Heath Ledger's death hit us hard.

Barry Morris was Lt. Gerard.

Isaac Hayes, George Carlin, Estelle Getty.

Sidney Pollock, Michael Crichton, and "Hey, Bo Diddley".

Charlton Heston was Ben-Hur.

Paul Newman was a beautiful blur.

Roy Scheider frightened us with Jaws.

Betty Page had... nary a flaw!

...And we all will mourn, Suzanne Horne.

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If you or anybody you know has written a Friday Flash 55, please come tell the G-Man. I will visit, read, enjoy, comment, then BOOK!!! So from the most gracious host from coast to coast, please have a Wonderful 2009!!!

Peace...!!!