Tuesday, October 15, 2013
It's Coming......
Hi there Big Boy.
Halloweens just a couple of weeks away.
Have you been Bad?
Really? Just how Bad?
Bad enough to feel the sharp sting of Leather on your ass?
Come a bit closer, Betty's got something for you....WHACK!!!!!!
Whats that? May you please have another one?......WHACK!!!!!
Now run along, and try to get into some more trouble......I'll be waiting.
Monday, October 14, 2013
Try It You'll Like It!!
Say it's a cool Autumn day, and you have a pot of Chile simmering on the stove.
During that long agonizing down time when the house smells FABULOUS and
you are just sitting around waiting...waiting....and waiting.
Whip up some easy to make corn muffins. BUT.......
Add your own special touch.
Instead of milk, substitute Creamed Corn.
Add a chopped Jalapeno pepper, and some Red Bell Pepper and chopped fresh
Chives for added color and flavor.
Grate about a cup of your favorite cheese. I used Hot Pepper Cheddar, then blend in.
Bake for 20 minutes at 400 degrees.
MMmmmmmmm...... If I can do it, YOU can do it!!
I just don't have it in me to talk about the Govt, or Ass-Holes today...Sorry.
Thursday, October 10, 2013
Friday Flash 55.....
What if.....Your local Meteorologist was a Poet?
"Your hiatus KILLS...My azure dome of tranquility.
The voltage builds, the electrons sweep
The wicked smiles, the revelers weep
HELL....Is on the wing!
I wait, quivering. Not with desire, but with despair. My loyal aide-de-camp..."
Forecast: Mostly cloudy with a chance of severe thunder storms.
Hmmmmm... I'm sure we all know folks like this, don't we?
If you or anyone you know is poetic, or has written a Friday Flash 55
Please come tell The G-Man
I will visit, read, enjoy, comment.....Then BOOK!
So from the most tranquil host from coast to coast
Have a Kick Ass Week-End!!
Wednesday, October 9, 2013
Thursday Portrait.....
Dobroye Utro Comrades!!!
In honor of Sputnik's 55th Birthday, I've donned my finest Russkie items...
My wind-up Rocketa watch that keeps perfect time, and my Back In The USSR Beatle tie.
And I hope to see you all on Thursday Evening 8:00 PM EDST (NOT Moskva time)
Do Svidaniya Putana's..........
Monday, October 7, 2013
Question...?
Here's my question of the Day......
Which pic represents America's BIGGEST Asshole?
You may also give me YOUR nomination if there is one.....:-)
Thursday, October 3, 2013
Friday Flash 55.....
He: Greek? Tonight only?
She: Yeah.....Greek!
He: Darling, (Sigh) after months of waiting, I'm finally going to realize the object
of my obsession..(chuckles lasciviously)
She: Enjoy... these moments don't come around very often Buster!
He: I know, just let me languish for awhile in this one...Tonight, it's all about Uranus!
She: ......Tonight ONLY!!!!
The Greeks are known for two things, and this ain't about yogurt.....
OK....On October 3rd the planet Uranus is visible to the naked eye.
Something about the position of the planet, AND the position of the Sun.
And of all of the planets in our solar system, Uranus is the only planet named after a Greek!
Hehehehehe......
If you or anyone you know is Greek, or has written a Friday Flash 55
Please come tell The G-Man
I will visit, read, enjoy, comment....Then BOOK!!!
So from the most Star Gazingest host from coast to coast
Have a Kick Ass Week-End!!
Wednesday, October 2, 2013
Thursday Portrait.....
1.) Walk on with a cooler labeled "Human Head" on the side.
2.) Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead muttering" Shut up, all of You. Shut up!
3.) Crack open your briefcase and whisper into it.."Got enough air in there?"
4.) Stand silently in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off!
5.) Greet everyone that enters with a firm handshake, and ask them to call you...Admiral.
6.) Meow occasionally...
7.) Bet the other passengers that you can cram a quarter up your nose..
8.) Stare at another passenger for awhile, then shout out in horror, "You're one of THEM"
9.) Wear a puppet on one hand, and use it to talk with the other passengers.
10.) Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.
11.) Announce in a Demonic voice..."I must find a more suitable host body"!
12.) Say....."DING". On every floor.
13.) Say..."I wonder what all these do". Then push all the red buttons.
14.) Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
15.) Grin at a customer for a long time then announce..."I have new socks on today"
16.) When the elevator is silent, look around and ask..."Is that your cell phone?"
17.) Try to make a personal call on the emergency phone.
18.) Draw a little square on the floor, then announce..."This is MY personal space"!
19.) When riding with only one other passenger, tap them on the shoulder, then look away.
20.) Push the buttons, then pretend they give you a shock.
21.) Ask to push the button for a new arrival, then push the wrong button.
22.) Call the PSYCHIC HOTLINE from your cell phone, and ask them if they know what
floor you are on.
23.) Hold the door open and say you are waiting for a friend, then after a while let it close
and say.."Hi Greg, hows your day been?"
24.) Drop a pen, then wait until someone reaches to pick it up then scream.."Thats MY pen"!
25.) Bring a camera, then snap everyone's pic on the elevator.
26.) Move a desk onto the elevator, then ask all that enter if they have an appointment.
27.) Lay down a TWISTER mat, then invite people to play.
28.) Lay a box in the corner, then ask everyone if they hear something ticking.
29.) Pretend you are a Flight Attendant, and review emergency exit proceedures with everyone.
30.) Ask...."Did you feel that?"
31.) Stand really close to someone...sniffing them occasionally.
32.) When the doors close, you loudly shout..."It's OK, they open back up again soon"!
33.) Swat at flies that don't exist.
34.) Tell people that you can see their Aura.
35.) Make race car noises when the elevator is moving.
36.) Shave.
37.) When at least 8 people have boarded, start moaning and say, "Oh no, Motion Sickness"
38.) Frown and mutter..."Gotta go, gotta go, gotta go," then sigh and say..."oops"!
39.) Show the other passengers a wound, then ask if it looks infected.
40.) Leave a box between the doors.
41.) Wave your hands wildly at invisible gnats.
42.) Start a Sing-A-Long!!
43.) Flatulance....The SBD kind.
44.) Do Tai Chi exercises.
45.) Flatulance....The Loud and Proud kind.
46.) Carry on a blanket, then clutch it protectively.
47.) If anyone happens to brush up beside you, recoil in horror and shout..."Bad Touch"!!!
48.) Sing "Mary Had a Little Lamb" while continually pushing the buttons.
49.) Bring a chair along.
50.) Lean against the button panel.
51.) While the doors are opening, whisper loudly..."Hide it Quick"! Then whistle innocently.
52.) Call out...."Group Hug"! Then inforce it.
53.) Try and teach everyone...The Macarena.
54.) Pretend you are horking up a Loogie, and have no Kleenex!!!
55.) Compose a story with a central character and a plot, in EXACTLY 55 words, post
it on your blog, then come tell The G-Man on Thursday Night 8:00 PM EDST......
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