Wednesday, October 2, 2013

Thursday Portrait.....

1.) Walk on with a cooler labeled "Human Head" on the side.

2.) Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead muttering" Shut up, all of You. Shut up!

3.) Crack open your briefcase and whisper into it.."Got enough air in there?"

4.) Stand silently in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off!

5.) Greet everyone that enters with a firm handshake, and ask them to call you...Admiral.

6.) Meow occasionally...

7.) Bet the other passengers that you can cram a quarter up your nose..

8.) Stare at another passenger for awhile, then shout out in horror, "You're one of THEM"

9.) Wear a puppet on one hand, and use it to talk with the other passengers.

10.) Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.

11.) Announce in a Demonic voice..."I must find a more suitable host body"!

12.) Say....."DING". On every floor.

13.) Say..."I wonder what all these do". Then push all the red buttons.

14.) Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.

15.) Grin at a customer for a long time then announce..."I have new socks on today"

16.) When the elevator is silent, look around and ask..."Is that your cell phone?"

17.) Try to make a personal call on the emergency phone.

18.) Draw a little square on the floor, then announce..."This is MY personal space"!

19.) When riding with only one other passenger, tap them on the shoulder, then look away.

20.) Push the buttons, then pretend they give you a shock.

21.) Ask to push the button for a new arrival, then push the wrong button.

22.) Call the PSYCHIC HOTLINE from your cell phone, and ask them if they know what
floor you are on.

23.) Hold the door open and say you are waiting for a friend, then after a while let it close
and say.."Hi Greg, hows your day been?"

24.) Drop a pen, then wait until someone reaches to pick it up then scream.."Thats MY pen"!

25.) Bring a camera, then snap everyone's pic on the elevator.

26.) Move a desk onto the elevator, then ask all that enter if they have an appointment.

27.) Lay down a TWISTER mat, then invite people to play.

28.) Lay a box in the corner, then ask everyone if they hear something ticking.

29.) Pretend you are a Flight Attendant, and review emergency exit proceedures with everyone.

30.) Ask...."Did you feel that?"

31.) Stand really close to someone...sniffing them occasionally.

32.) When the doors close, you loudly shout..."It's OK, they open back up again soon"!

33.) Swat at flies that don't exist.

34.) Tell people that you can see their Aura.

35.) Make race car noises when the elevator is moving.

36.) Shave.

37.) When at least 8 people have boarded, start moaning and say, "Oh no, Motion Sickness"

38.) Frown and mutter..."Gotta go, gotta go, gotta go," then sigh and say..."oops"!

39.) Show the other passengers a wound, then ask if it looks infected.

40.) Leave a box between the doors.

41.) Wave your hands wildly at invisible gnats.

42.) Start a Sing-A-Long!!

43.) Flatulance....The SBD kind.

44.) Do Tai Chi exercises.

45.) Flatulance....The Loud and Proud kind.

46.) Carry on a blanket, then clutch it protectively.

47.) If anyone happens to brush up beside you, recoil in horror and shout..."Bad Touch"!!!

48.) Sing "Mary Had a Little Lamb" while continually pushing the buttons.

49.) Bring a chair along.

50.) Lean against the button panel.

51.) While the doors are opening, whisper loudly..."Hide it Quick"! Then whistle innocently.

52.) Call out...."Group Hug"! Then inforce it.

53.) Try and teach everyone...The Macarena.

54.) Pretend you are horking up a Loogie, and have no Kleenex!!!

55.) Compose a story with a central character and a plot, in EXACTLY 55 words, post
it on your blog, then come tell The G-Man on Thursday Night 8:00 PM EDST......


Brian Miller said...

haha...i am going to use the demon voice in the middle of staff meeting in the morning...hahaha

Susan said...

I'm never riding an elevator again.

Mr. Charleston said...

I'm with Susan.

Grandmother (Mary) said...

5 and 14 made me laugh out loud but 48 is hilarious!

Mama Zen said...

I'm going to do the Admiral handshake!

Anonymous said...

These would all be way too much fun!

TALON said...

I need to ride on elevators more often. I'm missing out on a lot of fun! :)

Margaret said...

OH MY GOODNESS. I laughed and laughed the entire time. I have to share this with my family. Love the Twister game ... Love them ALL!

Grandmother (Mary) said...

Here's mine.

lime said...

lots of good ideas i just need an elevator...

Margaret said...

Shared this with my kids as we were eating out this weekend for lunch. ... LOTS of laughter (thanks!) but we might have annoyed the tables next to us :)