They say that Christmas is with family, and New Years is with friends. So to the friends that took the time to read my madness..........AAG, Ajax, Autumn Storm, Barman, Crabby, Erin, MilkMaid, Manny, Erika, SeaRabbit, Jenn, TC, Mr. Otis, Kristen, Madame, JQ, Phain, Sequin, Lime, Gale, Jillie, Jodes, Polyman, thank you so much.
I would like to propose a toast:
Heres to the friends, that are no longer here...and heres to the friends that ' are' still here...
CHEERS!!!!!!!!!!!
A special toast to my friend ROXI, who started it all...........F_ _ K OFF!!!!!!!!
And to Chandra......My friend, I can't imagine a day without you! BOTTOMS UP!!
Happy New Year Everybody......Much Love.....From Galen.......AKA....The G-Man!!!!!
Saturday, December 30, 2006
Thursday, December 28, 2006
Oh, Sweet Mysteries Of Life
Enough of the Christmas stuff already. Let's explore some mysteries of life..........
Why is it that you can be standing in line at Starbucks or Borders from 2 to 10 minutes, waiting and waiting and waiting for your cup of inspiration, and EVERY person waits till they get to the counter to read the frickin' menu? What have you been doing for the last 10 minutes?
It's coffee! Sure you got your decaf, you got your latte', you got your expresso, you got your cappucinno, you got your mocha, you got your double mocha latte' with no foam....but it's coffee.
Is it your first time in a coffee house? Order and go!
Why is it that when someone finds out you like pro wrestling, the first thing out of their mouth is, 'you know it's fake don't you'! REALLY? You mean you can't still walk upright after getting clocked in the head with a sledge hammer? You can't see if you get your eyes gouged out?
I've been going to wrestling matches since the days of Bobo Brazil, and Leaping Larry Chene, and Haystack Calhoun. It's sports entertainment!. Paul Newman's been killed many times, but he's still alive.
Why is it that people look so perplexed when you hand them a 2.00 bill? First of all they examine it like it was a 100. They call the MGR over to see if it's real.Then they can't figure out which cash drawer to put it in. I carry 2's around on purpose, just to jack with the clerks. I've been using them for years, I ask for them at the bank.
The greatist asset of a 2.00 bill is 'titty-bars'. In the dark they look like a 20, then you get a REAL great dance...Hell, then they don't know who the cheap bastard was until they've counted their tips at 3:00 AM....SCORE!
Why is it that when a man farts, the first thing outta his wifes mouth is..PIG!
But if a woman passes gas, she holds her stomach and say's 'tummy ache'.
Yeah, I got a loud tummy ache....but it just got better!
Why is it that people feel the need to walk around in a store jabbering out loud on a 'blue-tooth'?
In a car, on the road, it's safe and a God-Send. But in public it's irritating to listen in on other peoples drivel. What's wrong with..'I'M sorry, can I call you right back'? Do they need to feel that important? Besides it just looks STUPID!!!
Whew, I feel MUCH better. Have a Happy New Year ...from the G-Man
Why is it that you can be standing in line at Starbucks or Borders from 2 to 10 minutes, waiting and waiting and waiting for your cup of inspiration, and EVERY person waits till they get to the counter to read the frickin' menu? What have you been doing for the last 10 minutes?
It's coffee! Sure you got your decaf, you got your latte', you got your expresso, you got your cappucinno, you got your mocha, you got your double mocha latte' with no foam....but it's coffee.
Is it your first time in a coffee house? Order and go!
Why is it that when someone finds out you like pro wrestling, the first thing out of their mouth is, 'you know it's fake don't you'! REALLY? You mean you can't still walk upright after getting clocked in the head with a sledge hammer? You can't see if you get your eyes gouged out?
I've been going to wrestling matches since the days of Bobo Brazil, and Leaping Larry Chene, and Haystack Calhoun. It's sports entertainment!. Paul Newman's been killed many times, but he's still alive.
Why is it that people look so perplexed when you hand them a 2.00 bill? First of all they examine it like it was a 100. They call the MGR over to see if it's real.Then they can't figure out which cash drawer to put it in. I carry 2's around on purpose, just to jack with the clerks. I've been using them for years, I ask for them at the bank.
The greatist asset of a 2.00 bill is 'titty-bars'. In the dark they look like a 20, then you get a REAL great dance...Hell, then they don't know who the cheap bastard was until they've counted their tips at 3:00 AM....SCORE!
Why is it that when a man farts, the first thing outta his wifes mouth is..PIG!
But if a woman passes gas, she holds her stomach and say's 'tummy ache'.
Yeah, I got a loud tummy ache....but it just got better!
Why is it that people feel the need to walk around in a store jabbering out loud on a 'blue-tooth'?
In a car, on the road, it's safe and a God-Send. But in public it's irritating to listen in on other peoples drivel. What's wrong with..'I'M sorry, can I call you right back'? Do they need to feel that important? Besides it just looks STUPID!!!
Whew, I feel MUCH better. Have a Happy New Year ...from the G-Man
Tuesday, December 26, 2006
It's Finally Over
Only 364 more shopping days till Christmas!
I hope everyones recovered from the long Holiday week-end. Too much food. Too much noise. Too much booze. Too much wrapping paper....Too much joy?
It's no secret that it was not a very good year in the car business, and since I sell Chevys it sort of trickled down to my wallet. From what I've been reading around the web, at least I'm not alone in feeling the pinch. In past years my credit card got me through the Holiday Season, but this year I made a vow NOT to fall into that trap again. People would just have to understand. My wife is a very frugal shopper, and she buys little things all year round. Unlike me! I thrive on pressure. I love the hustle and bustle. I love last minute bargains. On Christmas Eve Eve, we sat down together and went over our gift list to make sure everyone was taken care of. Everyone was accounted for..... except each other!
Money was running low so we decided not to do anything for each other....Right! You know how that would fly don't you? So I did know this much, for about two months BOTH of our garage door opener remotes were fried. It was no big deal to me because I park outside anyway. But she had to park the car, get out , go in the house and open it with the button in the garage. Whew, what an inconveniance! Anyway on Saturday, I called just about every place in the phone book, and I finally found a place that was open. It was about 30 miles away, and he said he would wait till I got there before he closed. When I got there he already had the CLOSED sign up, and I thanked him profusely for the Holiday spirit. It was 29.95 plus tax, and he gave me exact directions in how to reprogram it. When I got home, she was shopping with my son, so it gave me the opportunity to set it up, and to my amazement, it worked!
So on Christmas morning, after all the hub-bub had died down, we were enjoying the lousy coffee that I make, I took her by the hand, walked out the front door, and from my pocket I pushed the button. Slowly the big old door moved upward and came to a rest, She gave a huge squeel of approval and reached into her robe pocket and pulled out 50 Dollars worth of Tim Horton's gift certificats..my favorite coffee...It was a great Chistmas after all!!
Happy New Year To Everyone....From The G-Man!!
I hope everyones recovered from the long Holiday week-end. Too much food. Too much noise. Too much booze. Too much wrapping paper....Too much joy?
It's no secret that it was not a very good year in the car business, and since I sell Chevys it sort of trickled down to my wallet. From what I've been reading around the web, at least I'm not alone in feeling the pinch. In past years my credit card got me through the Holiday Season, but this year I made a vow NOT to fall into that trap again. People would just have to understand. My wife is a very frugal shopper, and she buys little things all year round. Unlike me! I thrive on pressure. I love the hustle and bustle. I love last minute bargains. On Christmas Eve Eve, we sat down together and went over our gift list to make sure everyone was taken care of. Everyone was accounted for..... except each other!
Money was running low so we decided not to do anything for each other....Right! You know how that would fly don't you? So I did know this much, for about two months BOTH of our garage door opener remotes were fried. It was no big deal to me because I park outside anyway. But she had to park the car, get out , go in the house and open it with the button in the garage. Whew, what an inconveniance! Anyway on Saturday, I called just about every place in the phone book, and I finally found a place that was open. It was about 30 miles away, and he said he would wait till I got there before he closed. When I got there he already had the CLOSED sign up, and I thanked him profusely for the Holiday spirit. It was 29.95 plus tax, and he gave me exact directions in how to reprogram it. When I got home, she was shopping with my son, so it gave me the opportunity to set it up, and to my amazement, it worked!
So on Christmas morning, after all the hub-bub had died down, we were enjoying the lousy coffee that I make, I took her by the hand, walked out the front door, and from my pocket I pushed the button. Slowly the big old door moved upward and came to a rest, She gave a huge squeel of approval and reached into her robe pocket and pulled out 50 Dollars worth of Tim Horton's gift certificats..my favorite coffee...It was a great Chistmas after all!!
Happy New Year To Everyone....From The G-Man!!
Tuesday, December 19, 2006
It's Almost Here
Seasons Greetings From The G-Man...
I'm sure that many of you have children at home still. I'm sure that many of you have one or more parents still living. Some of you are even lucky enough to have one or more grandparents still living.
I was raised by my grandparents. My father was killed during the Korean Conflict, and my mother was a bookkeeper at a large local business. In those days women that did not work at a restaurant or a factory, were known as career girls. She wore nice clothes, she went out on dates, and we lived with her parents. My grandfather worked at an auto factory, and was a very decent, hard working man. My grandmother was the worlds greatest cook, and had a small catering business on the side.
My grandma was the youngest of 8 children, my grandpa was the youngest of 11. She had 4 kids of her own, including my mother. When I was 5, my mom remarried and had 5 more kids of her own. So without climbing my family tree for you, let it just be said that we brothers, sisters, and cousins were very close and muched loved..... We were poor, but didn't know it....
After my moms 3rd child, I was given the oportunity to move back with my grandparents, if I wanted to. Are you kidding! My own room, my own stuff, my old playmates, I jumped at the chance. In those days there were no nursing homes to speak of, and it seemed that the older people in my grandparents family came to our house to live out their final days..That was OK, we had the room.
Eventually, if you are young enough, you outlive everyone in your family.
Eventually, all your children leave home.
Eventually, your grandkids even leave home.
About two days before Christmas in 1975, I stopped by the house to see my grandparents, and to leave some presents under her tree. When I walked in the front door, she was sitting in the dark, with only the tree lights on. She did not look at me, she did not smile, she did not flinch, she didn't say a word. She just stared straight ahead, as if in a trance. Looking at the lit tree.
No matter how many times a called her name she didn't respond..Jeez I thought she had a stroke..Soon my gramps called me to the kitchen and said "don't talk to her, she's remembering". I said' remembering what'? He said, 'son, it's hard to explain, but some day you'll know'...
My mom is gone, grandma and grandpa are gone. Last year I buried my younger brother. I have a sister I haven't seen in 15 years. My baby brother lives in Virginia. My only daughter who is 20, is studying in Prague and will not be home until May. Last night as I was sitting in my living room with the tree on, I saw my daughters ornament ' Babys 1st Christmas'. Then I saw the stocking that my mom knitted for me when I was in her womb. Then all of the memories of past Christmasses flashed through my head. I sat there as if in a trance, not moving, hardly able to breath, spellbound by the lights....remembering the words of a simple man, 'son, someday you'll know'...30 years later, I knew.....
I think we were rich, and didn't know it.
I'm sure that many of you have children at home still. I'm sure that many of you have one or more parents still living. Some of you are even lucky enough to have one or more grandparents still living.
I was raised by my grandparents. My father was killed during the Korean Conflict, and my mother was a bookkeeper at a large local business. In those days women that did not work at a restaurant or a factory, were known as career girls. She wore nice clothes, she went out on dates, and we lived with her parents. My grandfather worked at an auto factory, and was a very decent, hard working man. My grandmother was the worlds greatest cook, and had a small catering business on the side.
My grandma was the youngest of 8 children, my grandpa was the youngest of 11. She had 4 kids of her own, including my mother. When I was 5, my mom remarried and had 5 more kids of her own. So without climbing my family tree for you, let it just be said that we brothers, sisters, and cousins were very close and muched loved..... We were poor, but didn't know it....
After my moms 3rd child, I was given the oportunity to move back with my grandparents, if I wanted to. Are you kidding! My own room, my own stuff, my old playmates, I jumped at the chance. In those days there were no nursing homes to speak of, and it seemed that the older people in my grandparents family came to our house to live out their final days..That was OK, we had the room.
Eventually, if you are young enough, you outlive everyone in your family.
Eventually, all your children leave home.
Eventually, your grandkids even leave home.
About two days before Christmas in 1975, I stopped by the house to see my grandparents, and to leave some presents under her tree. When I walked in the front door, she was sitting in the dark, with only the tree lights on. She did not look at me, she did not smile, she did not flinch, she didn't say a word. She just stared straight ahead, as if in a trance. Looking at the lit tree.
No matter how many times a called her name she didn't respond..Jeez I thought she had a stroke..Soon my gramps called me to the kitchen and said "don't talk to her, she's remembering". I said' remembering what'? He said, 'son, it's hard to explain, but some day you'll know'...
My mom is gone, grandma and grandpa are gone. Last year I buried my younger brother. I have a sister I haven't seen in 15 years. My baby brother lives in Virginia. My only daughter who is 20, is studying in Prague and will not be home until May. Last night as I was sitting in my living room with the tree on, I saw my daughters ornament ' Babys 1st Christmas'. Then I saw the stocking that my mom knitted for me when I was in her womb. Then all of the memories of past Christmasses flashed through my head. I sat there as if in a trance, not moving, hardly able to breath, spellbound by the lights....remembering the words of a simple man, 'son, someday you'll know'...30 years later, I knew.....
I think we were rich, and didn't know it.
Merry Christmas...Enjoy Every Minute Of It!!!
Monday, December 18, 2006
Holiday Shopping With the G-Man
Fed up with eating tips(get it)? How about a few Holiday shopping tips...........
If you are a stay-at-home spouse, it's not cool to charge your Christmas gift for the 'other'. That means they are paying for their own gift...c'mon!
Men, If you are crazy enough to buy an article of clothing for your wife or girlfriend, and don't know her size, always buy it smaller...."but honey, you looked that size to me'!
Men like tools for gifts. Under no circumstances buy an appliance as a gift for a women! But some women do enjoy fancy kitchen stuff. But think it through, and use extreme caution...
Really if you are in doubt...jewelry!
If you absolutely are last minute lazy, or are drawing a complete blank, you can never go wrong with cash or a gift card.
Combo-Gifts are quite cheesy...You know, anyone with a birthday within 3 weeks of Christmas.. 'Oh, it's for your birthday AND Christmas'.
Re-Gifts...Please Please, make sure that you are not giving the gift to the person that gave it to you originally! And make sure any old name tags adressed to you are removed.. And make sure any stickers on the gift are removed...To get a gift that says 'Compliments of State Bank', is not cool at all.
....And lastly, if the recipient of said gift, upon opening it repeats aloud what it is, you've made the wrong choice.........." Oh, a golf tie!'.........OR.....'Oh, a spatula!'
Happy Holidays...Galen
If you are a stay-at-home spouse, it's not cool to charge your Christmas gift for the 'other'. That means they are paying for their own gift...c'mon!
Men, If you are crazy enough to buy an article of clothing for your wife or girlfriend, and don't know her size, always buy it smaller...."but honey, you looked that size to me'!
Men like tools for gifts. Under no circumstances buy an appliance as a gift for a women! But some women do enjoy fancy kitchen stuff. But think it through, and use extreme caution...
Really if you are in doubt...jewelry!
If you absolutely are last minute lazy, or are drawing a complete blank, you can never go wrong with cash or a gift card.
Combo-Gifts are quite cheesy...You know, anyone with a birthday within 3 weeks of Christmas.. 'Oh, it's for your birthday AND Christmas'.
Re-Gifts...Please Please, make sure that you are not giving the gift to the person that gave it to you originally! And make sure any old name tags adressed to you are removed.. And make sure any stickers on the gift are removed...To get a gift that says 'Compliments of State Bank', is not cool at all.
....And lastly, if the recipient of said gift, upon opening it repeats aloud what it is, you've made the wrong choice.........." Oh, a golf tie!'.........OR.....'Oh, a spatula!'
Happy Holidays...Galen
Friday, December 15, 2006
Eating Tips For The Holidays
These are not my tips, but they are a swell guideline.......enjoy!
1.) Avoid carrot sticks at all cost....cheap filler.
2.)Drink as much eggnog as you possibly can, you can't find it any other time of the year.
3.)If something comes with gravy, eat it. Smother it on and over everything. Make a mini-volcano out of your mashed potatoes, and pretend it's hot lava.
4.)As for mashed potatoes, always ask if they are made with whole or skim milk. If they are made with skim milk, pass.
5.)Do not eat all day before going to a party. C'mon it's free!!
6.)If you come across something really good at the buffet table, position yourself nearby and do not budge. Eat as much of it as you can without drawing too much attention to yourself.You may not see that again for another year.
7.)Pies? Have at least one piece of each. When else can you have more than one desert?
8.)Fruitcake? Don't eat fruitcake at a party!
9.)One final tip..If you don't feel terrible when you leave the party...Reread tips and start over.
10.) And remember this motto..."Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a well preserved body. But rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in hand, screaming...WHAT A RIDE!!! " (this post is not for signgurl)
1.) Avoid carrot sticks at all cost....cheap filler.
2.)Drink as much eggnog as you possibly can, you can't find it any other time of the year.
3.)If something comes with gravy, eat it. Smother it on and over everything. Make a mini-volcano out of your mashed potatoes, and pretend it's hot lava.
4.)As for mashed potatoes, always ask if they are made with whole or skim milk. If they are made with skim milk, pass.
5.)Do not eat all day before going to a party. C'mon it's free!!
6.)If you come across something really good at the buffet table, position yourself nearby and do not budge. Eat as much of it as you can without drawing too much attention to yourself.You may not see that again for another year.
7.)Pies? Have at least one piece of each. When else can you have more than one desert?
8.)Fruitcake? Don't eat fruitcake at a party!
9.)One final tip..If you don't feel terrible when you leave the party...Reread tips and start over.
10.) And remember this motto..."Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a well preserved body. But rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in hand, screaming...WHAT A RIDE!!! " (this post is not for signgurl)
Fun With Blogging
Guess what? I can post today, with nothing to say. This is really weird. Blogging is soooo fun. Hopefully it will stay up and running, and I can really be profound....LATER.
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