Monday, May 14, 2007

Heads Up......

I love my bathroom! Not that it's anything fancy, cause it's not, but I love it just the same.
Sometimes a fella just has to have a place to hide.....You know what I mean? It has a very comfortable wooden seat, I have an ample supply of reading material, I have a TV tray in front of me that holds writing material, and the remote control for my color cable TV thats in there.
I also have a land phone extension in my little haven.....Hell, if I had a fridge and a mattress, I'd never have to leave the room.......Which segues me right into todays post theme. There were a few people the world, that met their demise while sitting on the 'throne', maybe they felt the same way that I feel about my special place....

Roman Emperor Elagabalus ( 218-222 AD )...Hacked to death by the Praetorian Guard as he sat on the toilet! His body was then thrown down the sewer...

King Edmund II "Ironside" ...Murdered in 1016 by a Dane armed with a long sword, who was hiding in the cess pit underneath the Royal Commode...

King Henry III of France, stabbed to death as he sat on the toilet, by a Dominican Friar named Jacques Clement. The Friar was convinced that the king was a heretic...

Russian Emperess Catherine the Great...Died of heart failure while trying to "pinch one", because she was always suffering from constipation...

King George II...According to his personal valet, one evening a loud noise erupted from the palace toilet, quite louder than the usual "Royal Wind", when he rushed in to investigate, he found the king dead on the floor. It seems that the king had fallen off the stool, and hit his head on a cabinet...C'est Dommage, N'est ce pas?

Lupee Valez...In 1934, this 36 year old actress was known as the "Mexican Spitfire". One evening during an attempted suicide, she miscalculated the required dosage and merely got sick, as she made a mad dash for the bathroom to hurl, she slipped on the tiled floor and was flung headfirst into the toilet bowl. The Maid found her the next day....drowned!

King HaakonVII of Norway...In 1957, he slipped on some soap in his marbled bathroom and smashed his head on some taps, fatally fracturing his skull...

Judy Garland...found dead by her 5th husband Mickey Devinko, on June21st 1969, sitting on her toilet: Official Cause of Death; barbituate poisoning...

Elvis AAron Presley...Died of heart failure on August 17, 1977, while trying to 'pinch one'
in his Graceland Throne room...

Michael Anderson Godwin...Having spent several years awaiting the electrical chair in South Carolina, In March of 1989 Goodwin had his sentenced reduced to life. Shortly afterward
he attempts to bite thru a cord on his TV while sitting on his toilet, He bites into a bare wire and since his toilet was metal..,.he was electrocuted!!

So the next time that you have to use the bathroom, be very careful, it could be your last!!

38 comments:

javajazz said...

i think it's rather rude
to kill people
while they are
on the toidy...
(i'm just sayin'...)

MONA said...

EEEEKSSSSS! HORROR!
I guess that makes a bathrom a 'way to hell!'

Gosh! How ill I ever step in there again!

Galen: It could ALSO be your way to heaven! :)

Queenie said...

I knew that there was a high percentage of deaths happen in the throne room. But not the amount of famous folks who took there last call there. Yet again g-man you have provided me with information to share over drinks.
Working on a '55'...

lime said...

ok, i am twisted but the accidental drowning did elicit a snicker from me....

Serena Joy said...

Dang! Who knew the stairway to heaven was in the bathroom?

cathy said...

the tag is my new post.
I was editing it.
off to work will read yours later.

G-Man said...

JJ, hasn't anyone ever hollored at you in the bathroom..."Hey, did somebody die in there"?

Yes Mona,It's either "The Highway to Hell", or "The Stairway to Heaven"!

Remember Queenie, It's a Friday thing..Good Luck!

Limey, glad to make you chuckle..xoxox

Serena, I've always known it! No one would believe me.

OK Cathy...I'll check it out!

SignGurl said...

*confusion* Why would someone try to bite through a TV wire while on the pot?

It's official! I know too much about your bathroom habits, from 500 Q-Tips to TV trays.

G-Man said...

Hey I don't know..who knows what goes thru the mind of a prisoner?
All I know is that he got fried!!

javajazz said...

no, but i've hollered that
after some people have left
the bathroom...
mornin G!
xo

G-Man said...

Mornin JJ, I'm on my way to work now, I'll talk to you later sweetie xoxo

tsduff said...

Okay, I'll never think of my bathroom in the same way... LOL That is NOT how I wish to be remembered... great post Galen!

MONA said...

two of our presidents died in the bathroom. I think a lot of ppl must be dying in there!

But I guess more die on streets than at home...

Ameratis said...

Now I never wanna go to the toilet again.


and just WHY do you have a phone and tv in your bathroom?

Thats gross :(

LOL

cathy said...

Well I'm glad I finally found time to come back and read this but I wish I'd taken a leak first. One never knows when there might be an assasin lurking behind the shower curtain!

ann said...

in England a fella hides at the golf course or a football match or the gym... occasionally the garden shed, but the loo... eeeeeek!

is that your cave?

you guys are so funny how comfortable you have to make yourselves, when us gals.... well it's just not ladylike to talk about what we gals do.

great facts, but there was an expression you used twice and I don't know what it means... I think we'll leave it that way ;>)

Breazy said...

what a crappy way to die! LOL! I knew about Elvis and Judy Garland but I didn't know about the others. Thanks for the info and you be careful in there G-man because we don't want to add your name to the list okay!

Have a good day!

furiousBall said...

Amen, the toilet is the common man's version of the batcave. We all need our stinky sanctuary.

javajazz said...

ewwww!

Dan B (no, not Bennett, think harder) said...

Speaking of Judy Garland and not Rufus Wainwright, there is an exciting and popular new group on Yahoo called The Judy Garland Experience. The group features ultra rare audio files, rarely seen photo's, lively discussions and more! This week in the audio section we are featuring a rare 50's concert presentation where the entire Rat Pack joined Judy onstage for their usual hijinx, Judy's complete 1967 concert on The Boston Common, several other garland audio odds and ends, and if that isn't enough we are also featuring excerpts from a rare 1973 concert performance by Mae West, yes, I said Mae West (you will jusy have to visit the group to find out why).
We have members from all levels of Judy fandom, hardcore, newbie's, Garland family members, people who knew and worked with Judy, authors, historians, film makers, other celebrities, and more. The only thing missing is you! Please stop by our little Judyville and check it out, you may never want to leave!
http://movies.groups.yahoo.com/group/thejudygarlandexperience/

MilkMaid said...

Danb...that's a lotta words up there. I feel totally unworthy to follow your comment.

G..that's some kinda shit.

:)

snowelf said...

Heh heh! I'm about to have a bathroom post too!!
This was very funny Galen. :)

--snow

ann said...

P.S. I forgot to say that the British man's ab fav watering hole is the pub! ;>)

Kristen said...

WHAT?????

I had no idea Elvis died while poopin'

gab said...

And truely thats not funny! My brothers mom was on the throne when she passed and she was totally naked.(she was getting ready for a shower) My poor bother found her like that...then he did what his mom asked...if I die on the throne please dress me before you call the parameditics. So he dressed her then call 911

MONA said...

Galen Galen!!!
You made me think about you in the bathroom this morn!

G-Man said...

Terry, Nice to see you.
Thanks for stopping by!

Mona, see?

Imp, I like being informed at all times!!

Cathy, this is not a pee post. I had one of those a few months back!
...Oh what the heck, you can talk pee whenever you want..,xoxoxox

Yes Ann, it's my cave!
And I think I know the terms in reference....
How about"Drop a Deuce"?
Same Diff...

Breazy, I'll try and stay alive in there OK?
Thanks sweetie xox

Thanks Furiousball for the support! And thanks for visiting.

JJ......?

Dan ? That was quite a comprehensive invitation to that website. It sounds very cool...
Except for the fact that I'm NOT a Judy Junky, I appreciate your zeal for her!

Hi Milkie, It's always good to see you. I'll have to return the favor!
Ride safe sweetie!!

Hi Snowelf...G-Man loves to see you here!!
I love women bathroom tales...xoxox

Ann...as if we didn't know..Hahahaha

Kristen, he wasn't poopin, he was trying to poop. Big Difference!!

Gabby, this wasn't a funny post...It was very factual!
Thanks for visiting. xoxo

Mona......Sari!
Hahahahahaha
Sari....get it?
Sorry for the Sari!

javajazz said...

what what?

javajazz said...

any storms your way?
i went out around 6 and
the second i pulled out of the driveway, came this big flood of rain, thunder lightning, the works...
scared the poop out of me,
speaking of bathroom tales,
the rain was blinding at one point,
as it came gushing down from the heavens...sound and light too, even...i cant see even when its not raining....this was scary.
glad you're home, safe and all...

Cazzie!!! said...

Yep it is not a joke to say that people die when on the pot. When I look after people who have unstable cardiac problems, when they ask for the pan, I also get the defib machine out. The Valsalva maneuver is the cause of many a heart attack.

MONA said...

Galen..LOL..Here I am laughing my ass off..Though I alwyas keep it well covered even in a Sari!!!

I wear them very rarely though..you know it is quite cumbersome to carry six yards of plain material wrapped around you...Guess I must post a pic of mine for an HNT in a Sari, specially for you! LOL

cathy said...

Judy Garland spam? LOL

G-Man said...

JJ, we got every bit of all that bad shit...

Cazzie, You can defib me any day sweetie. xoxox

Mona.....My heart just skipped a beat!
Galen would absolutely love to see you in a Tight Sari....OK?

Cathy..? You Think thats what that was??
Hmmmmm... Never got anything like that before.
I'm gonna do your tag this morning...G

MONA said...

"Tight" Sari? LOL

I would die in tight clothing!!!

MONA said...

Guess you will be Sooooo Disappointed with that HNT of a sari that keeps me so well covered :(

Jessica said...

seriously, ive hid in mine, too, i saw you on mona's site...so yeah, i know what you mean....no one is allowed to come in while you're there.....if they do...its just plain rude

G-Man said...

Mona...the tighter the better..xoxox

Jessica, welcome to the Jungle. I'm so sorry that you had to witness the bathroom blog on your first visit...Please forgive me.
Thanks for coming, and please come back!..Galen

tsduff said...

sufferin succatash is the only kind I know...