Tuesday, June 14, 2011

One Shot Wednesday.....



One Shot Wednesday's Laureate of Limerick
(Self-Proclaimed I might add) is at it again!
Like I said...SOMEONE has to do it!!
Besides, Fireblossom HATES Haiku...


There once was a Bimbo named Lindsay
No Panties and Booze were her Whimsy
When Coked-Up and reckless
She might Rip-Off your Neckless...
And her reasons for stealing were Flimsy!!


Bonus 'Classic' Limerick...

There once was a fellow named Dave
That kept a dead whore in a cave
I have to admit
She did smell like shit...
But think of the money he saved!!!


That last one always cracked me up...
Is it Wednesday? Do you have any poetry
or Prose of any style or form laying around?
Yes? Then please go visit....Here!

31 comments:

Eric 'Bubba' Alder said...

Reminds me of an old TV show - "Leave It To Beaver"

Kavita said...

bwahahahahah!!!!! If Lindsay gets around to reading this, it will crack her up too... oh but then again, she's cracked up already..ain't she!? ;-)

You're the dude, G-Man!! Awesome as ever!!!

HUGS!!! :))
Here.. I got a candle for ya (or is it for these blokes?) ;-)

Brian Miller said...

ugh dude, for all the money in the world dont know if i could...ugh...

and i got no clue what is up with linz...just crazy...

hedgewitch said...

Your Lindsay limerick definitely puts the crack in crackin people up.

That second one--were you in the military? My husband has a million like that.. I don't know how he remembers them when he can't remember what channel his Ice Road Truckers show is on, but I guess some things just stick with you.

LauraX said...

I really am laughing out loud at your bonus! Thanks for your sweet message at my blog...I wish it were true, that I ONLY see beauty...but I certainly do look for it as often as possible. Life isn't always pretty...and it is equally valuable to share the unsavory, uncomfortable realities too...but like a "good girl" I tend to offer the pretty stuff...at home my kids say I could embarrass a sailor! (shhh....don't tell)

Anthony Desmond said...

hahaha! poor Lindsay

brenda w said...

Okay, Here I sit with my 15 year old daughter, chuckling alongside me. Ha! Nice ones.

Tammy said...

Way too funny!

Lynne said...

Haha.. awesome..poor little rich girls...Great one-stop!

gab said...

you know even when i read a leave no comment im here but good god aint that the truth! and the last one reminds me of back in the days when Mr Gab drank and he used to tell me if I went first he would just keep me around so he could continue with sex just so he wouldnt have to find someone new LOL! My wish...we go together

moondustwriter said...

Maybe Lindsay and Dave could have a night on the town

Happy one shot

lime said...

ew ew ew....on both counts. clever but ew.

Other Mary said...

Ack! Good limericks..but necrophilia... on hump day??? Even in Wisconsin we don't do that! Well,most of us at least...

lori said...

eww, on both counts, lol...

Serena said...

Oh, Lord, you're at it again, cracking me up.:-) Word of advice to Lindsay if she steps out with ol' Dave -- keep your britches on!:)

Mama Zen said...

Why didn't she steal some panties, too? I mean, seriously . . .

TALON said...

lol, Galen - the Lindsay Limerick is bound to become a classic (not to say it isn't ick-inducing, but still a classic!) :)

You're becoming the Limerick Master!

Pat Hatt said...

haha yes she really has turned into a nut
Would probably even lick ones butt
If you gave her some spare change
Before she goes back to the rehab range
With enough perks to rival king tut

Sheila Moore said...

classic...both you and your poems :)

Kim Nelson said...

Oh my goodness, you are the racy one! But I gotta say... LL asked for it!

http://www.kimnelsonwrites.com/2011/06/14/letting-go/

kkrige said...

groan...

oh my. Happy OSW G. I'll be wroking on something tomorrow hopefully

Cloudia said...

you are a celeb hunter now!



Aloha from Waikiki :)

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Margaret said...

"Self Proclaimed" LOL

She needs to shoplift some practical stuff for a change...

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Shadow said...

you're on a roll...

the walking man said...

Nope nothing poetic today...sorry but liked Dave and Lindsay.

Raven said...

Always love a good limerick. :)

Raven said...

Always love a good limerick. :)

PattiKen said...

Lindsay Lowbrow, every parent's worst fear. What an airhead.

And as for Dave? Oh, yuck-oh!

libraryscene said...

You never fail, G... I must time any sadness around your Oneshots, really. Perhaps we should start a collection for Dave, ha!
(Btw, thanks for your kind words at OSP...made me smile.~ angela )

Daydreamertoo said...

OMG on both counts...LOL Made me giggle, thank you :)