Tuesday, July 1, 2008

Word Play Wednesday.....

Hi everybody...enough of the golf already!!!
I'm shelving Retro Wednesday this week in favor of...
Word Play Wednesday!!
I had such fun with the Oxymoron schtick, that I'd thought I'd try something different!
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger.. Then it hit me!
Police were called to a day care, where a 3 year old was resisting a rest.
Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off?
He's all right now!
The roundest knight at King Arthur's Round Table, was Sir Cumference!
To write with a broken pencil is pointless.
When fish are in schools, they sometimes take debate!
The short fortune teller who escaped from prison was...
A small medium at large!!!
A thief that stole a calender got 12 months.
Thieves that steal corn from a garden, could be charged with stalking.
We never run out of math teachers because they always multiply.
When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, U.C.L.A.
The math teacher went crazy on the blackboard..
He did a number on it!
The dead batteries were given out free of charge.
If you take your laptop PC for a run..
You could jog your memory!.
This last one I stole years ago from the GREAT Soupy Sales...
"You can lead a horse to water, but a pencil must be lead!!"
I hope you had some fun today...


Serena Joy said...

You're on a roll, dude. Those are really fun plays on words. It's like filling in a form by filling it out. Salute!:-)

gab said...

Om gosh I think Ive heard them all before! I loved Soupy Sales! Have a great week!

lime said...

i know a one legged lady named eileen. the one legged japanese lady is irene.

Rebicmel said...

It's one fifteen here and I can't sleep so I swung by to take a gander at your retro Wednesday, but it's Word play Wednesday this week, Galen did you run out of stuff to display??

Here's you some one liners boyo,

What's the difference between chopped beef and pea soup?
Everyone can chop beef, but not everyone can pea soup!

What do you call a fish with no eyes?
A fsh

Two peanuts walk into a bar.
One was a salted.

What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino?

Rest well, be sweet, and have a good day tomorrow

buffalodickdy said...

I had to stop reading at the 10th one- that's my limit! I have laughed so loud it hurt before, but I've never hurt so bad 'til I laughed, until now...

James Goodman, Author said...

Those were great, Galen. :D

Cazzie!!! said...

Ought I see the word "C.O.C.K" straight away when looking at that image? Far out! I am sure I do!

SignGurl said...


javajazz said...

these are quite funny and clever,
Mr. Knowitall...!

tsduff said...

Those were downright funny! I knew there was something wrong about being right... Excellent funnies for a ho-hum day. I did have fun this morning when I did my neighborhood walk trying to get my exercise. Oh, and took my kid and his pregnant wife to sushi for lunch (she had to eat California rolls with no raw fish because of the mercury levels but I had no such restrictions). Eat them up, yum~

J Morgetron said...

"Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off?
He's all right now!"

If you know this guy for reals and he happens to wear a size 7 1/2 women's shoe ... oh and he likes to wear women's shoes ... will you have him call me?

snowelf said...

Hehehe! I love the "all right" one!! I've hardly heard any of these Galen--thanks for the laugh today!! I needed it after all my kitchen drama!! :)


barman said...

Oh dear, I copied your jokes and forwarded them on and forgot to comment.

I love these. They are simple but fun just the same. I saw a couple of episodes of Soupy Sales but he was pretty much off the air before I watched much tv at all. I know I would have loved him however. I like cornball. Rebicmel, those are sweet too. Yep I love corn.

G-Man said...

Hey Sherry....
Numero Uno!!!
Thats what you could have yelled... UNO!!!

Hi Gabby...
I've met Soupy Sales..hehehe
"Hi Bird Baths"

Oh Trini...
A parting shot...:)

Are you an Insomniac??
Those were awesome..Thanks...G

Hey Buff...Thanks
A boiled egg is hard to beat!

Thanks James..
I bet you've been having fun.

You have 4 kids, I'm sure you've seen a lot of....Diapers..hehehe


I know it's your Birthday Saturday Lisa Marie...:P

Hi Terry...
California Rolls have that fake crab in it does it not?
Nice to see ya...G

Silly Girl...;-)

Oh No Snow...
I'll be right over...G

G-Man said...

I hope you had a happy birthday!!

smarmoofus said...

Up with a migraine (consuming caffeine as I type so I can hopefully get some sleep soon), and making the rounds. How have I not seen these before now? They're hilarious!

Thanks for taking my mind off of my head. I know, I know... it was so easy you could do it in your sleep. That's what's so great about you.