Tuesday, June 5, 2007

Way TMI Tuesday..........

I've told this story before, so please bear with me, I'm going somewhere with it.....
When I was born, we did not have TV yet. My Mom's favorite radio personality was a deep voiced man by the name of Galen Drake. It was this well-known man that I was named after. He later became the spokesperson for a popular product called Preparation-H.
For those of you not familiar with the joy of Hemorrhoidal Suffering, here is a brief overview.
Up until about 60 yrs ago, hemorrhoids were commonly refered to as Piles. In a nutshell, it is nothing more than inflammation or swelling of the rectum or anus. ( Rectum? It damned near killed him!)...Sorry, old joke. Hemorrhoids can extend beyond the anal verge sometimes, and can become very irritating and itchy. Both constipation and chronic diarrhea , which causes a strain on the rectum during bowell movements can cause this condition. Postponing bowel movements, and fiber-deprived diets may also contribute. Additional factors that can influence the course of hemorrhoids, are obesity, and a sedintery lifestyle. ( mostly because of the increase on rectal vein pressure ) . And anal sex can also stress the rectum, if little or no lubricant is used!! Before Preparation-H , Piles were treated for years in a natural and holistic way, these include....

Olive oil
Drinking 99% pure Aloe Juice
Taking herbs that stregthen the vein walls, like Butchers Broom, Bromelain, Horse Chestnut.
Applying natural astringents such as, Witch Hazel, Cranesbill and Aloe Vera
Drinking Camomile Tea several times a day
Eating fiber-rich bulking agents such as Psyllium Seed Husks, and Plantain, for softer stools.

Pile sufferers should avoid using laxatives, and should avoid hard straining during bowel movements. Avoid wearing tight clothing and tight underwear also...

People that sit a lot at their work, have been known to develope hemorrhoids. The novelist Anthony Burgess referred to them as Writers Evil. The British must have suffered greatly from them, because there are many British slang terms for the affliction, such as....
Chalfonts
Farmers
Nobbys
Badmittons
Ceramics
Nuremburgs
Emmas
Rockfords
Nauticals
Dehydration can cause a hard stool or chronic constipation, this can lead to hemorrhoidal flare-up. An excess of Lactic Acid can also contribute to Pile Pain, if this condition persists, avoidance of Dairy Products especially cheese can bring some relief. Vitamen E deficiency is also a common cause...Foods considered 'probiotic' can bring some comfort, these include yogurt with active cultures, and most fruits and vegetables..

If you are a hemorrhoid sufferer, you are not alone. Many famous people throughout history suffered this malady...
Socrates
Nero
Alexander the Great
Martin Luther
Lewis Carol
Charles Dickens
Edgar Allen Poe
Percy Shelly
Queen Victoria
Marilyn Monroe

There you have it......Way Too Much Information, for TMI Tuesday! I gotta go now, my Nuremburgs are starting to bother me a bit.... Peace..... Galen

27 comments:

MilkMaid said...

First?

MilkMaid said...

Yeah and second too ahahahahahaaaaa

MilkMaid said...

Ok...those bastards HURT. Of the devil I tell ya. :)

Have a good day Galen and eat your fruit and fiber.

MilkMaid said...

And third and forth if anybody was counting


BWAHA HA...easily amused milkmaid

G-Man said...

God I love Red-Heads!!!

MilkMaid said...

XXOO

Jodes said...

wow. i am, wow. that's all i got. ;)


GUESS WHAT???


HEADS UP!!!

lime said...

LOL, given the nature of this post i think you should also include that galen was an ancient greek doctor....

the doctor is in!

G-Man said...

Carol....You still got it baby...xoxox

Jodi...Thanks xoxox

Limey, I would LOVE to play Doctor with you!!!
xoxox

Queenie said...

Never heard of any the UK terms.
Did you know that childbirth labour can cause them for women, something else we have men to thank for (I was lucky).
Fancy one of my ancestors having them, 'Queen Vicky'.
Again a fountain of information, thank-you kind sir...

jillie said...

LMFAO @ g-man!!!!

You never cease to amaze me that's for damn sure. I know what my dinner conversation topic will be tonight...Tell, me...did you know that Marilyn Monroe suffered from the "rrhoids" well me neither!!!

You crack me up!!!!1

xo

Top cat said...

galen..this post is a real pain in the ass.
tc

Ameratis said...

eww this makes me want to stand up all day in my cubeohell. You come up with the craziest stuff :)

Serena Joy said...

LMAO, which is better than aching it off with the 'rhoids. Some of that info I'd never heard before. I CAN tell you that childbirth can give you a gigantic case of them.

evalinn said...

This post is weird. The Americans that I used to know were all very proude. I guess the Americans in Cyberspace are not, huh? Mr Knowitall, since u know it all, do u know what the Swedish word "galen" means?

ann said...

eeeeeeeeeeeeeeek and I have never heard of any of those so called English expressions...

you guys are lucky you don't go through natural childbirth

however... I have it on good authority that certain treatments are great for putting under the....

..... eyes

tightens them there ol' wrinkles.... apparently!

Top cat said...

pass the prep H will ya galen.
It's gonna be one of those nights.
I can't think of you being named after an ointment, after all you are DA MAN!
tc

Littlewing said...

Holy shit! Never had them and don't want them and NO ONE is going in MY back door!

SignGurl said...

Excuse me while I go to the bathroom....

Manny said...

I can always count on you g.

jillie said...

My butt hurts....

G-Man said...

All Hail the Queenie!!
Yes I knew about Pregger connection. I used to work in a Female Detention Facility, and Preparation-H, was a must have item. Thanks for your input...xoxox

Yeah Jillie, I sure know how to clear out a room!
xoxox

TC,
And I feel your pain!!!

Melodie,
Your so cute...xoxox

Serena Joy,
If I have brought a smile to your face, I am very happy...Thanks.xox

Evalinn,
What do you think I am...
Crazy?

Ann, It doesn't surprise me that you haven't heard of any of these terms. I believe that they were mostly Cockney expressions...Besides, many Americans have never heard of the term Piles!! I'm really happy to see you sweetie..xox

Top Cat, A little dab'll do ya!!!

Littlewing, Let the Hershey Highway go untraveled...Galen xo

Jenn, Your not gonna get sick are you?
xoxoxox

Manny,
Thats right, you Can always count on me!!!
xox

Jillie,
You light up my life sweetie!!! xoxox

snowelf said...

*plugs ears and sings*

TMI! TMI!

Just kidding Galen! Have a great night!

:)

--snow

G-Man said...

Hey Snowelf, hows school?

Top cat said...

I'm not putting Brylcreme on my ass.LOL

MONA said...

Tops? TOPS!!
You appear so many places here, you seem to be enjoying this post throroughly

Galen! Great information! Thanks!

G-Man said...

TC......?
Hahahaha

Mona, there you are!
I thought that you forgot me.xoxoxox