Monday, May 7, 2007

Saint Alphonso's Pancake Breakfast.....

I am not a happy camper right now...I just spent 2 frickin hrs typing a post because I'm such a shitty typist, only to have it not publish because of some frickin error that I've never heard of!!!
Serenity Now

Serenity Now

Serenity Now...
Let's try this again...I was about due for a more serious post, but it seems that no matter what subject you try and research, some elements of humor keep popping up.
The Roman Catholic Church has over 5,000 saints, many of them are "Patron Saints"...
Protectors of certain professions, sick people, and even hobbies. Here are a few of the more interesting ones...

Saint Matthew: Patron Saint of Accountants ( He used to be a tax collector )

Saint Joseph of Cupertino: Patron Saint of Air Travellers ( Nicknamed the Flying Friar, he could levitate )

Saint Matrona: Patron Saint of Dysentery Sufferers.

Saint Louis IX of France : Patron Saint of Button Makers.

Saint Anne: Patron Saint of Women in Labor. ( Not to be confused with Saint John Thwing, Patron Saint of Women in 'difficult' labor )

Saint Nicholas of Myra: Patron Saint of Children and Pawnbrokers

Saint Bernardino of Siena: Patron Saint of Advertisers and Horseness

Saint Blaise: Patron Saint of Throats ( He saved a child from choking ) and Diseased Cattle ( He also healed Animals )

Saint Joseph: Patron Saint of Opposition to Atheistic Communism.

Saint Joseph of Arimathea: Patron Saint of Funeral Directors.

Saint Eligius: Patron Saint of Gas Station Workers. ( He miraculously cured horses, the precursor to automobiles )

Saint Martin de Porres: Patron Saint of Race Relations, Social Justice, and Italian Hairdressers.

Saint Martha: Patron Saint of Dietitians.

Saint Adrian of Nicomedia: Patron Saint of Arms Dealers.

Saint Fiacre: Patron Saint of Taxi Drivers, Hemorrhoid Sufferers, and Venereal Disease.

Certainly from this list, theres a Saint just for you.....Peace ... Galen

29 comments:

jillie said...

wooohooooo!!! First.....SCORE! lol

tsduff said...

I am thankful I am not catholic.

cathy said...

AH! Now where to start?
St Ann is also the patron saint of infertility. She was visited by "an angel" whilst her husband was off praying in the desert on account of HER barrenness. The "angel's visit" resulted in Anne giving birth to a child.Way to go Anne and guys be careful what you pray for and how long you spend praying for it.

cathy said...

Note to self.
Really must start googling things.
My PC can barely be seen behind the piles of books that I'm using to compile my monster quotes post.
Now it also has a religious ref book as well as song
lyrics,philosophy, poetry...

lime said...

i just wonder if all those saint get on each other's cases up there......hahaha here comes fiacre...why dontcha ask him what sorts of syphillitic losers he's been hanging with lately...

who's the patron saint of mothers of teenagers?

Anonymous said...

velly velly interesting!
Not too sure these are sanctioned by the Church but then again....lol
You truly deserve the title of mr knowitall galen.:)
tc

G-Man said...

Jillie......The post?

Hi Terry, St. Francis of Assisi, is the Patron Saint of Birds..if you cared.

Cathy, I'm honored that you feel the need to reference my posts!

Morning Trini!!
Actually St. Monica is the Patron Saint of Mothers..and Abuse Victims. Isn't that the same thing?

G-Man said...

Mornin TC, well I certainly did NOT make them up!
It was all their idea not mine...
"Doubting Rick"...Hahaha!

GAB said...

There has to be a good name for me. St something or other one who babysits. LOL
anyways its always good to read your post cause I learn something every time be it good bad or just plain strange.

G-Man said...

Good Morning Gabby!
I'm glad your feeling better sweetie...
I try and learn something new everyday myself....Thanks xo

Mona said...

What do we have here? An all saints day?

Mona said...

Alphonso...& we have them a plenty here..the mangoes variety..tee hee!

G-Man said...

No I think thats in November....
Good Morning Mona...
Galen is sooooo glad to see you!!! xoxoxox

jillie said...

So what does Saint Sir Galen do??

Terry...I so hear you on that one. Just way too many fricken saints as far as I am concerned!

xoxo

Serena said...

Don't 'ya hate those frickin' errors? If somebody could bottle Serenity Now, they'd make a fortune. Maybe I'll try that when I run off and join the Little Sisters of the Sorely Put Upon and pray to St. Calgon, patron saint of weary and pissed off women everywhere.:)

G-Man said...

Jillie? I think he was the Patron Saint of Irreverent Big Mouths!!

Hi Serena Joy!!
You want Saint Calgon to..
" Take You Away"?
Thanks for stopping by...
Galen xo

lime said...

st monica it is! thanks g-man, what would i do without you...

no who is the patron saint of self-abuse...bwahahaha

Serena said...

You want Saint Calgon to..
" Take You Away"?


Unless I get a better offer.:)

javajazz said...

good morning mr knowitall!
firstly i am sorry you lost your two hours of typing work...thats SO frustrating and upsetting...

i was reading a childs book of how the body works (trying to research on a simplistic level the nature of thyroid) and i came across this dude Galen! turns out he was physician to the gladiators in the Colosseum in Rome, and the first to write about anatomy, tho he never actually cut into any humans so most of his research came from animals...anyway, people believed what he said anyway....(ha!)

thank you for this lovely offering of Saints to choose from...(Patron Saint of Italian Hairdressers? my mouth watereth...)

there's a Saint just for me?
sigh. one can always dream...
xo

Breazy said...

I am really glad I am not catholic because I wouldn't know who to go to for my problems if I were! What's up Galen? Not much here just taking a bit easy today.

Hope you have a good day!

snowelf said...

Hey Galen :)

I heard from a Catholic friend that if you are attempting to sell your house, you're supposed to bury a statue of St Anthony in the backyard.

Perhaps this is your something new today? ;)

--snow

Queenie said...

St Galen- independent educater to bloggers!!!!!

ann said...

ooooh am I last as usual?

here's a thought sweetheart; if you've got a long post... hmmm, if you're writing a long post do it on word then copy and paste. I too learnt the hard way

I didn't know my ex had a patron saint named after something he suffered... LOL That must be most comforting!

funny funny post

KJ said...

I hate when blogger screws up

G-Man said...

Lime, you'll never have to find that out...

Serena Joy, I really like you...

JavaJazz, I really love you...
And yes, you will find your Saint!

Hi Breazy, thats takin it easy...

Snowelf, That could be true. No reason to doubt it!..
I just love that new avavtar pic!!
Later Baby..xoxox

Queenie, I'm so glad to see you. You are too kind!

Ann, you'll never be last to me!
I hope you are only talking about hemerrhoids on the ex!

G-Man said...

But I love it when I see you KJ! xoxox

Mona said...

Galen, Good morning!

Its been ages since I had a bike ride. You should see the crowd here, it is like riding inside the Universal Studio on a weekend!

Anonymous said...

Being Catholic, I can tell you that many of them have no real significance for me... and anyone I know...lololol... I bet they probably payed their 'saint' title way too much... and didn't assumed it well while being alive... Catholic church is such a bunch of hypocrits... Arghhh!! Ibetter don't start on that.... ;-)

Serena said...

Why, thank you, sir. I like you, too. Love your style.