Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Retro Wednesday.....



Did you know that The G-Man belongs to a 'Secret Society'?
Not my college fraternity.
Not the Masons...The Knights of Columbus...or The KKK.
Not even the Knights Templar or The Rosicrucians!
The International Order of Turtles....
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Started in a Pub in England in 1943, to join, one must have the highest of moral standards, and NEVER be vulgar.
The rules are quite simple...Membership starts with an assumption, then Four riddles must be solved in a very clean manner. The assumption is that all perspective members own a Jack-Ass. From this assumption you can answer the 'Secret Question' with your coded answer.
Example:
Question...'Are you a Turtle'?
Answer...'You bet your sweet ass I am'!
Failure of a Turtle Club member to answer correctly, results in that member buying a beveridge of choice for the asker!!
The riddles to be solved are thus...
1. What is it that a man can do standing up..A woman sitting down...And a dog on three legs?
2. What is it that a cow has 4 of, and a woman 2?
3. What is a four letter word ending in 'K' that means Intercourse?
4. What is it on a man that is round and hard and sticks out of his pajama's so far that he can hang his hat on it?
.
President JFK was a Turtle!
Once at a press conference, a journalist once asked the President..Are you a Turtle? JFK just smiled and said..'I'll buy you a drink later'.
Fellow Turtle brother Wally Schirra was once asked by Deke Slaton while orbiting the Earth if he was a Turtle...Wally turned off his radio before replying.
So once the riddles are solved, and you sign your membership card, You are ALWAYS expected to give the correct response to the 'Secret Question'.
The Answers:
1. Shake hands.
2. Legs
3. Talk
4. His head
As you can barely see from my withered 41 year old card, I have been a member of good standing since August 27, 1969.
.
PS....I've yet to buy a fellow Turtle a drink. hehehehehe
.
.
.Peace...!!!

20 comments:

  1. Turtles rule!
    (just sayin`)



    Aloha from Waikiki


    Comfort Spiral

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  2. "I'll buy you a drink later". Haha...Awesome! :)

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  3. nice...you the man, err...turtle g-man.

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  4. Belly up to the bar. My treat ;) This rocks!

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  5. We're just now finding out that you're a, um, Turtle? Cool! I'll always stop to help one across the road, you know.:)

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  6. Sherry....?
    You bet your SWEET Ass I am!

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  7. i never in my life heard of this club. so funny!

    you know my boy's ringtone says "i like turtles!" makes me laugh to hear it now.

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  8. Are you pulling our * * * s or what? :)

    I am sometimes amazed at the topics you come up with. Way out there!!!

    PG

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  9. I'm thinking of all those "dry" turtles (Dry Tortugas) out there, since you have never bought one a drink...

    About that 1901 Indian cycle...My first motored vehicle WAS a Whizzer made by Indian--essentially a motor and gas tank mounted on a glorified bicycle.

    Now...is it true that you once asked Abe Lincoln for his address, and he answered, "Gettysburg."

    At least, that's what folks are sayin'--grin!

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  10. awesome~! you have such a knack for being into things and knowing things i have never heard of, and those questions they have a board game now called 'dirty minds' probably made up by a turtle. the sample question on the outside of the box reads"A womans nickname ----" and they give you three letters

    "-unt"

    i know you have the correct answer

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  11. I just asked MWM those questions and the only one he didn't answer right was #1, he just sniggered.

    Does that mean he's part turtle G-man? ;)

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  12. and I thought #3 was seks. Guess I owe you a drink...oh wait I am not a member of the secret turtle society.

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  13. Am I not turtlely enough? Funny movie!

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  14. Jingle...Thanks
    Cloudia..Aloha
    Me...MGD 64 please
    Brian...Thank You
    Thom...Mahalo
    Sherry...:-)
    Lime..Thats funny
    PG...Thats cause I'm Old!
    Steve-O..You were there to hear it!
    Tagskie...Thanks, Hi
    Ake...hehehehe
    Mark...I'll send you a card
    Buff...You need a card too

    Suzie...'Aunt'

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  15. talk about deep g! Ok, I am now burying my head in the sand! :D

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  16. I ALSO WANT TO BE A TURTLE!!

    Now that I know all the answers...Duh Huh...

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  17. Pretty cool. How come there's only one 5 on that clock? Friday's a comin'!

    chitowngreg
    http://chitowngreg.wordpress.com

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  18. Nicely! Did you hear the one about the Turtle that let the Cat out of the bag?

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